SoberNotMature - Episode 201 (Comparing Ourselves To Others)

00:00:01.66
Bill
All right, everyone. Welcome once again to another episode of Sober Not Mature. And yeah, we got we got past the the old fat man holiday, which you don't participate in anyhow.

00:00:13.34
Mike
Right.

00:00:13.86
Bill
So um yeah I thought about that the other day. I'm like, we we didn't have to do anything this this year. I mean, I did. I'm sure you saw. up ah but Hopefully you did all the AI shit I did with Christmas stuff.

00:00:25.61
Bill
It's just that kind of that made me laugh, you know, as far as posting and stuff like that. But yeah, But I mean, yeah, with the exception of just wishing people a you know Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, blah, blah, blah. We didn't really have to go into anything, you know, as far as not that we have to, but you know what I mean.

00:00:34.74
Mike
Right.

00:00:39.19
Mike
right

00:00:39.64
Bill
You know, usually at least it's it's acknowledged that there's a holiday coming up. But yeah, now it's done.

00:00:45.27
Mike
Well, what's our mantra on the whole thing? It's just another day on the calendar.

00:00:49.56
Bill
it That it is. And you know what? A week from a week from yesterday, there's another one of them. our hol Well, two days. week for Wait, week from Wednesday. Yeah, Wednesday. New Year's Eve?

00:01:00.12
Mike
Yeah.

00:01:00.92
Bill
like I'm forgetting what fucking day it is. when Yeah, Wednesday's New Year's Eve. Yeah, so there's another one coming up, and that's ah that's another, what what do they call that?

00:01:05.43
Mike
Yes.

00:01:08.16
Bill
Amateur night, right?

00:01:09.08
Mike
Yes, they do. i certainly do.

00:01:10.58
Bill
Yeah, well, yeah, it's just, ah i don't know.

00:01:12.21
Mike
Yeah. Yeah. Uh-huh.

00:01:14.84
Bill
we've We've talked about that before. no No sense. And if we want to tell tell fun stories later, if we got time or want to, we can do that.

00:01:19.90
Mike
yeah

00:01:20.68
Bill
But yeah, that was the same thing. I was thinking, eh.

00:01:23.64
Mike
a

00:01:24.98
Bill
But I am in a little town in Wisconsin right now. And I'll tell you the name of the town in a minute. But I thought about because I watched... um every year for around christmas i i usually watch both home alone movies um i'll watch christmas vacation i watched that last night i got like 20 minutes left to go but i'm like i don't know if i'm allowed to watch the rest of it now since it's past but maybe maybe it's so i'm fucking around i just fucking her around but but usually it's those three three movies and

00:01:45.59
Mike
i believe I believe so. Yeah, you're you're fine. Again, day on the calendar.

00:01:54.04
Mike
You can watch it in June if you want to.

00:01:56.25
Bill
I know. i i've got I've got choices today.

00:01:59.17
Mike
That's right.

00:01:59.96
Bill
But, you know, so Home Alone, obviously, of Gus. Well, first of all, um John Candy's character, what do you know what his last name, Gus, the the Kenosha kicker, is saying?

00:02:08.22
Mike
Oh, Jesus.

00:02:08.25
Bill
Do you know?

00:02:08.74
Mike
No, no. It's been a long time since I've seen that.

00:02:12.25
Bill
Oh, really? Okay. So um I always thought it was Gus Galinsky, but it's Polinsky, like P-O-L, Polinsky, which makes more sense because, you know, kind of like a Polak thing.

00:02:15.90
Mike
Yeah.

00:02:18.90
Mike
Yeah. Okay.

00:02:22.20
Bill
But um which which, again,

00:02:22.36
Mike
Well, yeah. Hey, now. Only I could use that word. Okay.

00:02:26.58
Bill
No, I've got i've like an eighth eighth of me.

00:02:27.75
Mike
Ah. Okay.

00:02:29.10
Bill
um I was just going to say the reason that we're allowed to use that word is because we are we are we are part of.

00:02:30.95
Mike
Yelp.

00:02:33.66
Mike
ah

00:02:35.06
Bill
I'm a very, very small. It was on Grandpa Jay's side.

00:02:38.87
Mike
okay

00:02:39.10
Bill
So he was he was Russian and Polish. That's why he's so fucking mean.

00:02:42.20
Mike
yeah you

00:02:46.22
Bill
But yeah, well, his dad was fucking Russian. So yeah, his mom was, his mom was polar. So, so anyhow, but um yeah, I had, I was thinking about it that it was just kind of funny.

00:02:50.52
Mike
Okay.

00:02:54.54
Bill
I didn't, when I watched the movie the other day, it's before I booked this trip, but there's a, I would like to play something from, from our good friend, not our good friend, but you know, from, from John Candy.

00:02:58.42
Mike
um

00:03:04.79
Mike
Yes.

00:03:04.78
Bill
It's from that, that movie.

00:03:06.33
Mike
Okay.

00:03:06.49
Bill
And if I, if I may, can I, do you mind?

00:03:08.57
Mike
i Please do.

00:03:09.69
Bill
Yeah. All right, this is only one minute, but let's let's see if we can get the volume here. Ready? Here we go.

00:03:20.46
Bill
Allow me to introduce myself. Gus Polinski. or Polka King of the Midwest.

00:03:30.55
Bill
did The Canosha Kickers. Hi there. Hi there. No? No. That's okay. I thought you might have recognized Anyways, um I had a few hits a few years ago.

00:03:41.84
Bill
That's why, i you know, Polka, Polka, Polka, Polka. No? ah Twin Lakes Polka, Damavuji Polka, aka Kiss Me Polka, Polka Twist.

00:03:54.04
Bill
These are songs. Yeah. Yeah. We some fairly big hits for us, you know, in the early 70s, Yeah, we sold about 623 copies of that. In Chicago? No, Sheboygan.

00:04:05.69
Bill
Very big in Sheboygan. They loved it.

00:04:10.14
Bill
So that that is where I'm at.

00:04:10.46
Mike
he

00:04:12.46
Bill
I am actually in right now, everybody. I am in Sheboygan, Wisconsin.

00:04:15.29
Mike
Mm-hmm. very big in Sheboygan. 600 six hundred some copies. Mm-hmm.

00:04:21.27
Bill
Yeah, what did say, 632 or whatever it was. It just kind of it cracked me up because I didn't think about it. I'm like, oh, fuck. i should It just crossed my mind the other day after I booked the trip. And I'm like, that'd be kind of fun.

00:04:31.66
Bill
But the the other thing, too, so everyone, if you, well, when or if you if you have a minute, to take a look at your faucet, too, because I'm actually 15 minutes away from Kohler, Wisconsin, which is the the manufacturer of kitchen faucets, bathroom faucets.

00:04:32.18
Mike
it

00:04:42.34
Mike
Ah, mm-hmm.

00:04:47.13
Bill
So, Yeah, I'm like within probably for you, Mike, within Parma distance ah of Kohler. I think it's 15 minutes away or whatever it is.

00:04:53.11
Mike
Right. Well, fair is my favorite faucet, so...

00:04:54.65
Bill
So.

00:04:58.86
Mike
Hehehehe. Hehehehe.

00:05:00.22
Bill
yeah That took me literally 1.2 seconds to figure out.

00:05:03.86
Mike
Hehehehe.

00:05:04.24
Bill
I was about to say, I've never heard of a Farrah Fawcett, but then i got it.

00:05:07.74
Mike
he

00:05:07.96
Bill
I got it before i before I had to say anything stupid. I got it. So, yeah, she was she was actually a favorite of mine, too.

00:05:12.88
Mike
Yes, right. And down.

00:05:16.43
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:05:16.55
Bill
Youngsters, if you don't know who Farrah Fawcett is, fucking shame on you, but look her up.

00:05:18.71
Mike
Uh-huh. yes right

00:05:21.43
Bill
and look Definitely look her up. But, yeah.

00:05:23.16
Mike
and down

00:05:27.06
Bill
Yeah, there was, i had a poster of her. I had a poster of one of the Heathers, I think, of my room of affair was definitely the one I had, like one of the first ones I got. But I think every every young young boy in the 70s had a poster like that there're in their room. So...

00:05:43.01
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:05:43.93
Bill
But yeah, so anyhow, I'm in Shaboyga just came up here. I'm going hang out with a friend of mine tomorrow and I get together with my kids for for lunch.

00:05:48.70
Mike
Cool.

00:05:51.97
Bill
Kimmy was supposed to I think I told you that Kimmy was supposed to come down to Indiana over the weekend.

00:05:56.68
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:05:57.11
Bill
Her and Ali were and then she ended up checking with a doctor because just as a quick reminder, everyone, she's she's like really fucking pregnant right now.

00:05:57.40
Mike
Right.

00:06:02.13
Mike
Mm-hmm. Yeah, right.

00:06:04.92
Bill
You know, um you know, so ah she's, you know, a few months away from from having the the second child. And, you know, I I had nothing to do with it except for producing her.

00:06:10.71
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:06:13.24
Bill
But I get a second grandchild out of it, which is going to be wonderful.

00:06:13.62
Mike
Right.

00:06:16.72
Bill
But, yeah, she had ah a checkup and her doctor's like, I want to take that log of a trip.

00:06:22.94
Mike
Right.

00:06:24.09
Bill
So, yeah, we're just all going to get together and hang out at Derek's place, I guess, and do whatever.

00:06:29.53
Mike
Cool.

00:06:29.75
Bill
So, yeah.

00:06:30.33
Mike
Nice.

00:06:31.48
Bill
All of it worked out well. So I got a bunch of other little shit on here. i Did I tell you? I don't know if I told you since we talked last. I fucking deleted all the other things I had on here, but I got other shit that came up during the week.

00:06:41.94
Bill
I've got new shit that I wrote down. Oh, one last quick note. Jeremy's episode last week.

00:06:46.07
Mike
Yes.

00:06:47.26
Bill
um is doing really, really fucking well.

00:06:50.49
Mike
Good.

00:06:50.54
Bill
um So I don't know. We might have to, just for selfish reasons, we have to have them on again. I mean, i not that we'd to say not that we want to.

00:06:55.22
Mike
Yeah.

00:06:58.84
Bill
Of course we would. But in the, like the differences between, if you remember the, um like there's plays and then there's streams.

00:07:00.02
Mike
Right.

00:07:05.98
Bill
So streams, it's it's still a little bit more in the streams, but not that extreme. um But the plays, I mean, it actually, this play should be, and I don't know if it's 80% 90% or more,

00:07:16.59
Bill
But, um, he, this, his episode literally got like three times the amount of play. So like full listens compared to any normal episode of ours.

00:07:22.62
Mike
Yeah.

00:07:25.21
Bill
Um, I mean, the streams are about, yeah, they're a little bit more, but but again, not as extreme.

00:07:25.27
Mike
All right.

00:07:31.49
Bill
It's definitely more, but, um, I don't know.

00:07:32.71
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:07:33.54
Bill
And, uh, we got one comment just from some random dude. Kathy said that she really loved them.

00:07:38.62
Mike
Right.

00:07:38.91
Bill
Um, every clip that I did this week is usually, you know, obviously they're all random ones.

00:07:42.68
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:07:42.98
Bill
I'm like, that was a great fucking clip. They were all him.

00:07:44.88
Mike
Yeah.

00:07:45.54
Bill
A little bit of you and I popped into a couple of them, but I don't know.

00:07:45.64
Mike
Yeah.

00:07:49.80
Bill
So anyhow, Jeremy, if you listen to this, I didn't text him or anything like that or message him, but your episode has done very well. So yeah, maybe, maybe we'll have to have you out again.

00:08:00.61
Bill
Who knows?

00:08:00.92
Mike
Yeah, absolutely. Right. I mean, I enjoyed it, so I'm glad other people are too. Yeah.

00:08:05.72
Bill
Yeah, it was it was really fucking good. And the fact that he doesn't, listening back to it, or listening back to the whole thing and then listening to the clips, um I would have never guessed that he that he wasn't, that he hadn't done that before.

00:08:14.15
Mike
Right.

00:08:19.34
Bill
You know?

00:08:19.51
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:08:20.60
Bill
That he had, not not just a podcast, but um he seemed really, really comfortable telling that type of a story and didn't seem structured. I know he said he had a bunch of fucking notes, but, you know, he, yeah, which is, I am so happy that he said that.

00:08:29.98
Mike
That he didn't use.

00:08:33.94
Mike
yeah me too.

00:08:34.37
Bill
I'm like, yeah, yeah. Because I can usually tell when people are, sometimes you hear the paper, you know, w rustling when we've had guests on, but sometimes you can tell when when people are going down the list, which again, it's their own deal, you know, but I don't know.

00:08:39.70
Mike
is he

00:08:46.36
Mike
Yeah.

00:08:47.34
Bill
We try to try to just keep them on a normal conversation. But anyhow, Jeremy, excellent episode. if If folks have not listened to it, it was the episode before this, so episode 200.

00:08:52.12
Mike
Yes.

00:08:57.82
Bill
Definitely listen to it. Listen to other ones too.

00:09:00.15
Mike
Yeah, right.

00:09:00.14
Bill
um Hey, if you get a chance, but you Jeremy's episode was was beautiful. so

00:09:04.70
Mike
Yes, it was.

00:09:05.94
Bill
All right. But, okay. So what do you think? Let's get back to let's get back to basics here. Let's stop fucking around with Sheboygan and fucking Kenosha Kickers and Jeremy and whatever.

00:09:15.38
Mike
Right. pollocs

00:09:16.92
Bill
yeah Exactly. Poloxy. I can say that again. I can say Poloxy. I can say Russians, too. I can say, I don't know, whatever.

00:09:22.26
Mike
right

00:09:23.56
Bill
I can say Poloxy. don't know that.

00:09:25.66
Mike
Yes, you can. All right. So I'm assuming you're you want me to do a reading.

00:09:30.94
Bill
You know what? You can do whatever you want, Mike.

00:09:32.84
Mike
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

00:09:33.02
Bill
I've i've known to you i've known you long enough that whatever I might want you to do, I don't think it really matters much these days.

00:09:33.94
Mike
Hmm.

00:09:37.37
Mike
a Right.

00:09:39.80
Bill
Good.

00:09:40.02
Mike
definite That is true. All right. Yes, I do have a reading and I suppose we shall get to it. All right.

00:09:48.28
Bill
Good.

00:09:48.85
Mike
That's from Keep It Simple. a couple of days ago, read it and went, ah that one's pretty decent. I'll go ahead and do that. And it almost fits into the season.

00:10:00.94
Mike
ah So what the hell? All right.

00:10:03.41
Bill
Yeah.

00:10:03.86
Mike
This was ah December 23rd from Keep It Simple. Gracious acceptance is an art. We think that we have to learn how to give, but we forget about accepting things, which can be much harder than giving. Accepting another person's gift is allowing them to express his feelings for you.

00:10:26.71
Mike
Alexander McCall Smith. I did not look that one up. And I don't know who the fuck it is off the top of my head. So there you go. All right. ah Many of us took so much from others during our addiction that now we may not want to ask for anything.

00:10:44.34
Mike
We may be afraid to ask for help. So our needs go unmet. In fact, many of us would now rather give than receive. In recovery, we need to understand the difference between taking and receiving.

00:11:01.18
Mike
Giving to others is important. So is receiving from others. As we grow spiritually, we learn to accept gifts. The gift of sobriety teaches us this.

00:11:12.63
Mike
We need to accept the gifts the world gives us without shame. We are entitled. Our higher power loves us and will give us as much as we're willing to receive.

00:11:25.05
Mike
Prayer for the day. Higher power. Help me to be receptive to your gifts. Help me to see and believe that I'm entitled to all the happiness of the world.

00:11:36.41
Mike
Action for the day. Those pesky actions. I'll think of what a friend has given me. I'll thank this friend.

00:11:45.75
Bill
All right. um I think, well, I mean, I do remember that one because I think I might have either either I posted that or I wrote something down about it. But I guess if I wrote something down, maybe we'll find out.

00:11:58.02
Bill
We'll find out either either this week or there you know a few weeks from now whenever we read shit again.

00:12:00.82
Mike
Right.

00:12:01.66
Bill
And we're like, didn't we just talk about that?

00:12:03.61
Mike
a

00:12:03.70
Bill
you know We'll get into that fucking bullshit again. But um okay.

00:12:05.91
Mike
Right.

00:12:07.06
Bill
So that the action line again, think about a gift that was given to us by a friend.

00:12:11.03
Mike
Yeah, I'll think of what a friend has given me. I'll think of this friend. Mm-hmm.

00:12:15.22
Bill
Well, and I mean, i that that's an easy one, but um I mean, I hope, I well i guess, that well, maybe let me step back.

00:12:22.33
Mike
Yeah. Mm-hmm.

00:12:23.70
Bill
um These days, it should be, should be an an easy thing for us to, you know, say thank you. And I think we talked about that in one of the readings ah a couple of weeks ago, but certainly not in our nature, but I think, you know, easier these days.

00:12:31.10
Mike
Right.

00:12:37.78
Bill
But there was quite a few things that that I wrote down, but I like the term and I don't know that I really focused in on it when I read it, but um gracious acceptance.

00:12:48.91
Bill
What is that? um What do you think of that? I mean, literally that I don't know. I just thought that was I like it. But I mean, what do you think of that as a as a term or concept?

00:12:54.78
Mike
Right.

00:12:57.53
Mike
Well, yeah, absolutely. You know, um, again, like it talked about being takers and and all that stuff. Um, you know, yeah. Graciously accepting, not expecting it, not, you know, um, being grateful, you know, um, and, and,

00:13:15.19
Mike
And, you know, having, having some grace and some, some yes, you know, um, being truly appreciative of what someone else is willing to give to you, you know, whether it's time or, you know, energy or whatever the fuck, man.

00:13:31.05
Mike
Yeah. You know, um, yeah, don't, you know, I, it uses the word entitled a couple of times, which I don't like, uh,

00:13:37.28
Bill
Mm-hmm. i wrote that i wrote I wrote that down.

00:13:41.10
Mike
uh, but, um, Yes, but, you know, exactly. um Being, again, kind and in in allowing other people to do for you because it's helping them be better people too.

00:13:57.45
Bill
Right. And I, and I did write that down to allowing other others to give, um, because we had talked about that. It's been a while ago. um and I know that it was a, it's something shit it could have been a year ago.

00:14:05.11
Mike
Right. Mm-hmm.

00:14:08.61
Bill
We, you might've done this reading last year. or We talked about it or it came up, maybe whatever.

00:14:10.23
Mike
Right. Right.

00:14:13.33
Bill
We've talked about that this concept before, but I think it's a good one because

00:14:13.68
Mike
Mm-hmm. Sure. Right. Well, there's only four concepts, so, you know, right.

00:14:19.16
Bill
right. There's a, there's five topics, only four concepts.

00:14:21.78
Mike
Yes.

00:14:21.84
Bill
So whatever, you guys going to hear the same fucking things all the time. We we've established that.

00:14:25.13
Mike
Yeah. Right. Mm-hmm.

00:14:28.30
Bill
it's That's why we got a Jeremy on every once in a while to, you know, it's it to get us off into a different direction.

00:14:33.77
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:14:34.26
Bill
um But the the whole the whole idea behind it of, again, being gracious, allowing others to do it and that sort of thing.

00:14:41.78
Mike
is

00:14:42.39
Bill
if we If we aren't allowing others to to give and we aren't allowing others to appreciate things, i don't know if we... talked about it this way last time, but it just made me think about that.

00:14:51.83
Mike
here

00:14:52.06
Bill
I'm like, that's extremely selfish, you know, of, of us being like, you don't have to do this and and whatever.

00:14:54.42
Mike
Oh, yeah.

00:14:59.40
Bill
I don't need anything, blah, blah, blah. And making a big deal out of it is fucking selfish. Right.

00:15:05.27
Mike
Absolutely. Yeah. Not allowing people to do things for you.

00:15:06.68
Bill
yeah

00:15:08.94
Mike
I mean, you know, we know the feeling when we do something for somebody else and how it makes us feel good. That's why we continue to do it selfishly. ah Right.

00:15:18.38
Bill
Right.

00:15:20.32
Mike
what That we've learned in this program, you know, doing for others makes us feel good and yeah still selfish and self-centered. We want to feel good. So we do things for others, um but we have to allow others to do that for us too.

00:15:34.57
Mike
Yeah, it is. Like you said, totally selfish to not let somebody else do that for us.

00:15:40.19
Bill
Right. Well, and, you know, and it made me think about a couple of different, well, a couple of things recently. um Well, even with, I mean, like i always tell my kids, you know, Christmas and birthdays and Father's Day or whatever.

00:15:49.48
Mike
Right.

00:15:50.35
Bill
I'm like, I don't, I don't need anything. What I, what I want, I want time with you guys.

00:15:52.52
Mike
Right.

00:15:54.63
Bill
that That's it. um But when when I'm given a gift by either of them, um either of my kids, I mean, it's it's it's heartfelt.

00:16:03.40
Mike
Right.

00:16:05.14
Bill
It's because they wanted to. And every once in a while, they've even said, I know you said you don't want anything.

00:16:06.78
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:16:09.34
Bill
I'm like, no, no, no. I don't mean it that way. I'm just telling you, I don't need anything.

00:16:13.16
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:16:13.28
Bill
But if you guys if you guys choose to get me something, i'm not I don't want to take away from that. i'm not I always appreciate it.

00:16:18.14
Mike
Yeah.

00:16:18.76
Bill
And um it means something because It's not just, okay, just because it's it's this particular, like you like we were just talking about in the beginning, just because it's this day on the calendar, well, here's a gift, you know.

00:16:25.81
Mike
Right.

00:16:28.50
Mike
Right. Right.

00:16:30.80
Bill
um It's not like that, and I don't want it to be like that. I don't need to be – I don't need that, you know.

00:16:34.14
Mike
see

00:16:36.44
Bill
um But when they do something like that for me, it's – I really do.

00:16:36.54
Mike
this

00:16:40.08
Bill
I really appreciate it. And like what Kimmy's done since my grandson's been around – It's a lot of times it's things that, that he's made or they've made together. And I mean, that shit means a fucking whole lot, you know?

00:16:51.06
Mike
right

00:16:51.95
Bill
So, I mean, truly, truly appreciate it. And yesterday, and I, I know Kathy does it all the time.

00:16:54.84
Mike
isn

00:16:58.95
Bill
We, Kathy and I, with Kathy and Kylie, what I do for gifts is, is basically I ask Kylie every year, usually when we're sitting down on Christmas day, you still do Apple gift cards?

00:17:08.42
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:17:09.50
Bill
Yes, I do. Okay. I'll send you one later.

00:17:11.45
Mike
Right.

00:17:11.46
Bill
that's how that's what we do with our gifts she got me this uh this book um this dictionary of sarcasm did you see it okay and i didn't i was going to post it separately but i like it when i have more time and when i kind of dig it and into it i will but i i need to bring it on here we fuck around with it every once in a while if we got nothing better to do um but i mean that was number one she didn't need to get me anything but um you know saw it and she's like as soon as i saw it i knew i had to get it for you that means a lot you know And then Kathy always does stockings, you know, and she includes it for me.

00:17:13.86
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:17:17.56
Mike
I saw that. Yeah.

00:17:24.28
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:17:27.00
Mike
Right.

00:17:34.52
Mike
Yeah. Right. Right. right Absolutely. Right.

00:17:43.74
Bill
It's it's candy. It's whatever. She used to get me Domino's gift cards. Now she'll get me a gift card for Airbnb. um She bought me up ah a thing of chapstick, which is I just I'm like chapstick.

00:17:55.10
Bill
She's like, well, you know, it's stocking stuff. It's weird things. I'm like, I'm like, no, no, no. I said, it's really fucking weird. But I said, it's really fucking useful.

00:18:01.53
Mike
right

00:18:02.10
Bill
Yeah. You know, I'm like, I'm like, I'm not, I'm not down, you know, downplaying it. I'm like, I never would have expected to get a thing of chapstick in, in a stocking.

00:18:09.84
Mike
Mm-hmm. Right.

00:18:11.16
Bill
Cause I know she does it. I don't expect it, but I know she does it. And she likes doing shit like that.

00:18:14.06
Mike
Mm-hmm. Yeah, right.

00:18:16.18
Bill
But um again, she literally thought of, thought of me, knows I use chapstick and got me chapstick.

00:18:21.08
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:18:21.30
Bill
That may seem fucking weird, but that, that means something to me because it's specific, you know?

00:18:23.32
Mike
Yeah? Right. Yeah, right.

00:18:27.19
Bill
And then same thing with her in this whole, this, like this last procedure, you know, when she was talking about wanting to come down and I don't remember if I mentioned it on here.

00:18:27.32
Mike
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

00:18:35.15
Bill
I told her, I said, I said, you know what, it's not, it's not necessary. You don't have to come down.

00:18:39.26
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:18:39.87
Bill
And, you know, she's like, well, whatever I'd like to, whatever. And then, um you know, I said, we'll we'll figure it out.

00:18:43.66
Mike
Uh-huh.

00:18:46.03
Bill
And that was obviously after the first one, whatever.

00:18:48.55
Mike
Yeah.

00:18:48.95
Bill
So at at whatever point, you know, um I said, just so you know, I said, I really appreciate the offer. And I said, absolutely. You want to come down? You want to hang out?

00:18:56.49
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:18:56.71
Bill
By all means. And she's like, she's like, well, don't want to interfere on your space.

00:19:00.69
Mike
All right.

00:19:01.69
Bill
And I said, I just, I'm like, I didn't. She's like, no no, no, I guess I don't mean it that way. And I said, it's okay. You know, what however it just came out is I said, I didn't want to make you feel that way. I said, here's what I don't want to do.

00:19:11.81
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:19:12.61
Bill
I said, I don't want to take away the fact that you want to do something like that.

00:19:12.85
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:19:17.19
Bill
Okay.

00:19:17.41
Mike
Right.

00:19:17.45
Bill
Okay. What I was trying to let you know to begin with, as I said, it's not critical.

00:19:18.01
Mike
that

00:19:21.31
Bill
It's not necessary, but I would it's appreciate it.

00:19:22.83
Mike
Right. Absolutely.

00:19:25.33
Bill
You know, and um the fact that you're going to be there, you don't need to stay long. i'm I'm going to be fine. I know that. But one way or the other, it was nice, and I appreciated the effort that she put in to do it, you know.

00:19:36.34
Bill
So, I mean, those are just kind of like three examples, recent ones, you know, but it's again, it's hard. It's the immediate thing. I don't I don't need the help. It's unnecessary. I don't need a gift. Those are my those are my defaults.

00:19:45.88
Mike
Right.

00:19:47.66
Bill
But then, you know, everything on here, you know, we've got it. We've got to allow others. So, yeah.

00:19:51.29
Mike
Absolutely. Yeah. Sure. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. a

00:19:55.29
Bill
Again, we we learned we learn over time, but, you know, it's, again, after even after all these years, you know, it's still within me. And, it's again, it's it's not that i I'm not afraid to ask for help because i wrote I wrote that down.

00:20:07.06
Mike
sure h

00:20:08.34
Bill
If I need help these days, I mean, I've learned that that I'll ask for it. And I guess maybe maybe that's a good question.

00:20:12.31
Mike
ah

00:20:13.86
Bill
when did When do you think you got over that, whether or not it was up being afraid of, if nothing else, that the hesitation to ask for help?

00:20:22.23
Mike
Right.

00:20:22.23
Bill
from maybe maybe somebody outside of AA or the program.

00:20:26.54
Mike
Mm-hmm. Um, still kind of working on that one. Um,

00:20:32.63
Bill
ha

00:20:34.68
Mike
You know, um yeah, again, well, like we always talk about balance. I mean, it is that balance. You know, I was such a huge taker and so entitled um for so long that it's still I'm still working on on that balance of, you know, balance.

00:20:52.47
Mike
do this for me or no, I will do it myself or, you know, okay, let's do this thing together. Cause it's going to, you know, make it easier for me and it's going to allow you to help me still working on it.

00:21:04.99
Bill
Right.

00:21:05.75
Mike
Um, yeah, of course, clearly I am better. Um, you know, the, the original question was, when did I, um, you know, stop being afraid to ask for help.

00:21:17.74
Mike
Well, that was, um you know, when, when I started deflating my ego a little bit.

00:21:22.84
Bill
Right. Right. right

00:21:24.25
Mike
of Right. Yeah. You know, again, you know, the, the, the weird, the flip side of how i am now is how I used to be. I expected you to do everything for me.

00:21:36.63
Mike
um And shit. And, ah you know, and didn't want to do anything myself. Um, uh, you know, and certainly didn't want to give back. Um, yeah.

00:21:46.69
Bill
Right.

00:21:47.72
Mike
So, you know, it's, again, I'm working on it. It's, it's still finding that, that balance, but, uh, you know, it's a hell of a lot more balanced than it used to be.

00:21:58.78
Bill
right Yeah. And that's ah it, if nothing else, because i mean, I just gave you three examples where, you know, i it was, i don't know, necessarily old behavior, but you know, this, ah this thing, these things that are ingrained in me haven't, haven't gone away, but um it's the same thing.

00:22:13.62
Mike
me

00:22:14.31
Bill
It's, you know, character defects. I mean, we recognize it.

00:22:15.83
Mike
Yeah.

00:22:16.52
Bill
It even saying that and I realized what I said to Kathy about the whole procedure thing um after the fact that I didn't mean it any way, but I realized how it came out.

00:22:21.14
Mike
Right. Right.

00:22:25.29
Bill
And I know for a fact, because of what she said, she's like i want to what made out your space. I'm like, Oh fuck.

00:22:30.40
Mike
Right.

00:22:30.49
Bill
I didn't, I didn't mean that, you know? Um, not at all.

00:22:32.18
Mike
this

00:22:34.30
Bill
Um, but you know, it just, it, it is, it sometimes it's kind of like, I'm good, man. You know, I'm fucking good.

00:22:39.48
Mike
Yeah.

00:22:40.30
Bill
You know, I mean, things are fine.

00:22:40.41
Mike
Yeah.

00:22:41.78
Bill
I mean, I, I know how to do this. I'll, I'll get it done. Um, but you know what?

00:22:44.85
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:22:45.34
Bill
Yeah. When I, when I need help, I mean, I'm not, ah I'm not afraid or, or hesitant to ask for it, but, um, I'm going try to see if I can it done myself first.

00:22:54.20
Mike
Yeah, yeah.

00:22:54.50
Bill
Um, You know, if I can fucking figure it out, you know, and sometimes I just can't that I'm at my wherever my wits end are.

00:22:57.13
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:22:59.67
Mike
Yeah.

00:23:01.36
Bill
I'm right there or whatever wits end are wits end are.

00:23:02.43
Mike
Mm-hmm. easy

00:23:06.32
Bill
I'm right. I'm right there. But yeah, so the whole the whole entitled thing and I wrote down entitled to gifts and then it said later entitled to happiness. It might have said it one other time, too. um I think we've been pretty clear about the word entitled before, and you've actually you've brought it up twice in in tonight's conversation.

00:23:19.42
Mike
Yes. indeed this is

00:23:23.34
Bill
so But just just for the people in the back that might not have heard it the first time, how do you feel about the word entitled, Mike?

00:23:26.55
Mike
a

00:23:30.14
Mike
I fucking hate it. Again, because I spent the first 42 years of my life very fucking entitled.

00:23:33.02
Bill
Yeah,

00:23:39.57
Mike
This world owed me fucking everything. And, ah you know, that was that was a huge thing i needed to unlearn and and... not be that way anymore.

00:23:50.11
Mike
So yes, I understand the meaning of the reading.

00:23:52.95
Bill
Right.

00:23:53.47
Mike
You know, yes, we are entitled to happiness. We don't deserve to be miserable, blah, blah, blah. I understand all that. But I personally have to be very careful with the, even the thought of any sort of entitlement.

00:24:08.89
Bill
Right. Well, and and and that's the thing, I think a better way to put it is that, you know, we we end up receiving gifts, um you know, and not not necessarily entitled, but like we talked about.

00:24:09.62
Mike
Yep.

00:24:15.04
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:24:19.05
Bill
I mean, the the simplest one is that happiness is a byproduct of, you know, and, you know, name name the thing that we talked about.

00:24:22.87
Mike
Right.

00:24:25.43
Mike
Yeah.

00:24:25.77
Bill
And

00:24:26.13
Mike
Right.

00:24:26.94
Bill
The same thing with somebody actually wanting to buy us a gift or give us something or do something for us is a byproduct of how we fucking act, you know, and how we've changed.

00:24:31.09
Mike
Mm hmm. Mm hmm.

00:24:36.77
Mike
Yep.

00:24:38.42
Bill
And do we deserve it? I don't know. We we get it because of who we are now versus, you know, who we weren't, you know, or who we were, you know, before was just a but couple of fucking a-holes.

00:24:40.93
Mike
Yeah.

00:24:44.05
Mike
Right. Right. Right.

00:24:48.88
Bill
Well, no, still a-holes, but just, you know, little bit more social.

00:24:49.25
Mike
Yep. Right. it's Smaller ones. Smaller and cleaner.

00:24:53.78
Bill
Yeah.

00:24:57.46
Bill
Are we, are we bleached a-holes?

00:24:59.16
Mike
heaven

00:25:00.73
Bill
o

00:25:05.31
Bill
I think the, I'm going to just try to skip over that. So anyhow, the, the, the only other thing that I wrote down, but I think we already talked about it was taking versus receiving, which it is, I mean, it's a, it's, it's a minor distinction, you know, but it's, it's one that I think both of us, all of us, well, Let's just talk about the two of us.

00:25:08.54
Mike
All right.

00:25:14.05
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:25:24.82
Bill
I think that both of us can agree that we need to be very aware that we're not taking something that if somebody's receiving, we're looking at it as a gift rather than something we're taking, right?

00:25:35.32
Mike
yeah Yeah, exactly. A gift rather than something we're stealing. Yes.

00:25:39.29
Bill
yeah Yeah.

00:25:39.56
Mike
Something that someone's willingly giving to us. Yeah.

00:25:43.46
Bill
Yeah, or something that we're we're entitled to. Yeah.

00:25:49.11
Bill
But, yeah, okay. Well, you know what? i Gosh darn it, Mike, I like that one. that's a that's a a That was a good reading. That was a humdinger.

00:25:55.77
Mike
That was all right.

00:25:56.76
Bill
So, eddie any anything else that that jumped out at just stood out at you, stood out at you?

00:25:56.88
Mike
Yep. Ding that hum.

00:26:04.98
Mike
that Whatever. I think we covered it.

00:26:07.64
Bill
yeah yeah You know what I meant. You know what I meant, I guess.

00:26:10.39
Mike
Yeah, I do.

00:26:12.76
Bill
ah Okay, so... um Let's see. So we talked about obviously, Oh, you know what? um I get a, there was a, you want to hear a ah holiday story has nothing to do with the, with me.

00:26:24.91
Bill
It was just the, the radio station I listened to. This is, this just makes me laugh. I've heard this years ago, but this was shit.

00:26:29.87
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:26:30.83
Bill
They, they were doing the, the guys from the morning show were out this week. So Monday and Tuesday they did the, technically it's their, their year in review year so far, whatever the fuck they do.

00:26:40.93
Bill
But, Though they've done um around Christmas time, they do these holiday horror stories.

00:26:41.33
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:26:46.85
Bill
They'll have obviously listeners send in stories of, you know, holidays and shit that went wrong and blah, blah, blah.

00:26:46.87
Mike
Okay.

00:26:52.38
Bill
And they're fucking hilarious. Some of them are just I mean, they're they're like jaw dropping, kind of like this one. um But they're just they're lot of fun.

00:26:58.51
Mike
Uh-huh.

00:27:00.62
Bill
So this one was actually back from they replayed it. The Eric, the producer, replayed from God, I think 2014.

00:27:09.43
Bill
I was fucking laughing, but also just like, oh my God, I completely forgot about this. But I'm going to do a lot of this. Well, all of it's pretty much from from memory, but i I want to tell you this story. So first of all, this guy writes in, it it was a guy that wrote in and he started it off.

00:27:23.83
Mike
Dear Casey.

00:27:24.98
Bill
yeah It was he was kind of like that kind of like that. But he said, so first of all, he's one of um he was one of eight kids. And he was talking about his his mom.

00:27:33.66
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:27:35.66
Bill
He goes, we used to go over to, always went over to our moms for Christmas. And he said, as a side note, this I wrote this one down right away. My mom is the most vile and horrible person in the world.

00:27:47.06
Mike
yeah

00:27:49.46
Bill
So that's how the story starts out. Okay. Okay.

00:27:51.37
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:27:52.47
Bill
So again, he's one of one of eight kids. I don't know what the mix was between boys and girls. Doesn't matter. So the the year that they were talking about, this would have been Christmas of 2000.

00:28:03.22
Bill
Well, it was red in 14, whatever it was, maybe a year before. But the dad had just passed away that year at some point, whether it was a month or two prior, but before that Christmas.

00:28:10.56
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:28:13.26
Bill
So mom was still, let me say their mom. I don't want anyone to think that this was our mom.

00:28:18.04
Mike
Right.

00:28:18.63
Bill
This was not our mom.

00:28:20.09
Mike
Right.

00:28:20.28
Bill
Not. Not. Um, so their mom was still going to host Christmas and, you know, everyone's going over there begrudgingly because she is, let me repeat that, the most vile and horrible person in the world.

00:28:31.14
Bill
Um, so they all show up and, you know, she's, he also says that she, um, their mom likes playing the victim.

00:28:31.19
Mike
Mm hmm.

00:28:38.78
Bill
It's always this and that and blah, blah, blah. And, I mean, one of the things, you know like somebody walks in and she's like, she'll say something to one of the one of the wives of ah of a one of the kids and say, you know, you're actually the you're the least attractive you know spouse of any of my children type of thing.

00:28:52.89
Mike
Wow.

00:28:54.87
Bill
But, I mean, always playing the victim on whatever, you know, poor me this, poor me that, blah blah, blah, blah, blah.

00:28:58.58
Mike
Uh-huh.

00:28:59.83
Bill
So everyone's there with their significant others, you know, do the dinner, the whole bit. then I guess after dinner, the mom says, okay, I need to, I need to meet with or have a, have a conversation with all my kids.

00:29:10.81
Bill
So everyone else needs to get the hell out of the room. Just my, just me and my, my kids. So again, father, father just died.

00:29:17.80
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:29:18.11
Bill
Mom's at the head of the table. All the kids are sitting around the table, all adult children, of course.

00:29:22.18
Mike
Right.

00:29:22.42
Bill
So she's like, she goes, first of all, your father was a horrible human being. He treated me like garbage for years. And then the guy says, side note, my father was one of the most wonderful human beings ever did everything for her, was treated like shit by her for years and years and blah, blah, blah.

00:29:32.60
Mike
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

00:29:36.43
Mike
aha

00:29:37.91
Bill
And all she ever wanted, you know, again, speaking of entitled, blah, blah. um You know, so clearly ah that wasn't the case. But so then the mom goes on and she said, she said he was so evil to me and so mean to me.

00:29:51.14
Bill
She said I did everything or no. She said he forced me into the arms of many men over the years.

00:29:57.66
Mike
no

00:29:59.03
Bill
So she's having this conversation with the kids. Okay. And all the kids are like, you know, kind of wide eye and, you know, jaws dropping or whatever.

00:30:05.58
Mike
Uh-huh.

00:30:06.39
Bill
And then she says, on top of that, she said, she said, none of you are his kids. She said, i made sure of it.

00:30:12.92
Mike
Wow.

00:30:14.74
Bill
And then she, there was envelopes on the table with all their names on it.

00:30:15.10
Mike
Wow. Mm-hmm.

00:30:18.18
Bill
She said, inside each envelope is the name of, of your father. And she's like, blah, blah, blah. Merry Christmas. And walks out of the room. So all them are just like, whatever, they're opening up to the thing.

00:30:29.05
Bill
And there's like three or four names at each list. So apparently she didn't even know who she fucked, you know, that might've been their father whatever. So I guess over the next couple of weeks, all the kids went and they got DNA tests and sure as shit, none of them, none of them matched.

00:30:39.64
Mike
Yeah. Wow.

00:30:43.50
Bill
So, um, again, to go back to mom is the most vile and horrible person in the world. i Again, I'm fucking laughing, but I'm like, could you even fucking imagine?

00:30:54.59
Bill
you know So she literally ate eight kids, went out of her way to fuck people that have kids that weren't weren't fathered by her husband.

00:30:57.72
Mike
Wow.

00:31:02.23
Bill
I'm like, that's that's beyond, I can't even, I don't even know. Don't even know what to say.

00:31:07.06
Mike
Yeah.

00:31:07.41
Bill
so

00:31:07.70
Mike
that That is some fucked up shit.

00:31:11.45
Bill
So anyhow, Merry merry Christmas, everyone.

00:31:14.45
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:31:17.53
Bill
All right, so let's get on to a different one. And this was a this was a quote, actually, and I was listening to – I listened to – there's a couple of, like, notes on a Joe Rogan podcast or podcast. But this one, he was talking to somebody about whatever.

00:31:30.83
Bill
I don't even remember who the who his guest was. But they they brought up a quote from Mike Tyson's trainer, like his trainer back in the day. And I don't even – I don't know who the guy was.

00:31:39.70
Mike
he

00:31:41.16
Bill
I didn't write down his name or whatever. But he ended up reading the quote and then I looked it up and I thought this was kind of interesting because it talked about fear. So obviously some we talk about.

00:31:48.52
Mike
Yeah.

00:31:49.92
Bill
So his trainer had said, um fear is like fire.

00:31:50.30
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:31:54.03
Bill
If you can control it, it could cook for you and it can heat your house. If you can't control it it will burn down everything around you and destroy you.

00:31:58.15
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:32:02.36
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:32:03.03
Bill
So why what do you think about that? Yeah.

00:32:07.16
Mike
I think that's pretty fucking good, actually.

00:32:10.74
Bill
I'm going to read it again because I fucking loved it.

00:32:12.44
Mike
Yeah.

00:32:12.98
Bill
and i was I was hoping you'd see the same the same kind of, I don't know what you want to call genius in it, but I did.

00:32:15.45
Mike
Yeah. Mm-hmm.

00:32:18.02
Bill
um So fear is like fire. it can If you can control it, it'll cook for you and it can heat your house. If you can't control it, it will burn everything around you and destroy you.

00:32:29.98
Mike
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

00:32:32.57
Bill
Because what they were what they were talking about was, I think they were talking about ah Joe Rogan does jiu-jitsu. He's done martial arts and blah, blah, blah, and whatever.

00:32:41.31
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:32:41.41
Bill
he so They got into some comment or ah conversation about fear, you know saying that um I guess he for years was was fearful when he went into the ring and that gave him a little bit an edge.

00:32:52.38
Mike
You're right.

00:32:52.76
Bill
And then he got competent where he wasn't afraid anymore.

00:32:52.89
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:32:55.48
Bill
And it fucked him up because he had nothing. He lost his edge, you know. And then that's how he brought up Tyson. He's like, he goes, Mike Tyson. He goes, you know, think about this. He goes, nobody would ever think that that motherfucker was afraid.

00:33:06.25
Mike
Right.

00:33:06.49
Bill
But he said he admitted that he was he was scared every time he got into the ring. um You know, what whether it was the unknown, whatever it was.

00:33:10.97
Mike
Right.

00:33:13.29
Bill
But he came in with that, like, kind of an edge type of thing. But then, you know, that's this is where the the quote from the trainer came up. So I don't know. i just thought that was interesting because clearly we, the, the topic of fear comes up all the fucking time and we've come to the, well, i realized that fear's at the base of everything in my goddamn life.

00:33:26.66
Mike
Right.

00:33:33.66
Mike
right

00:33:33.76
Bill
Um, you know, but, um, I mean, literally, do you think is fear something? The only thing I had, ah i guess, a question on was, do you think we can actually control the fear?

00:33:44.18
Bill
I mean, when, I mean, I get a cooking and heating the house, but is the word control the right way to put that?

00:33:46.63
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:33:49.34
Mike
Um, yeah, you know, absolutely. Um, you know, manage may be a better word, but yeah, I, you know, I mean, well, the big book says, you know, we're driven by a thousand forms of fear.

00:33:55.13
Bill
Right. Okay. Right.

00:34:00.26
Mike
Um, yeah.

00:34:00.54
Bill
Right.

00:34:01.54
Mike
and So yeah clearly it's, ah it's a big part of our makeup, uh, us alcoholics and addicts. Um, Yeah, but, you know, we've also, you know, we've talked on here about healthy fear. And I mean, you know, clearly, you know, the fear of going back out, you know, keeps us doing what we need to do so that we don't.

00:34:22.07
Mike
um You know, there' yeah, that that's that's it. That's controlling the fear. That's managing the fear, which I think I do like better. than control um because you know yeah we have control is is kind of like entitlement it's a word that we don't particularly find useful um but yeah manage you know and and and use it in the right way um you know clearly fear is always going to be a part of us um but what do we do with it and and where do we apply it so that it can be useful?

00:34:29.27
Bill
Right. I do too. Yep.

00:34:53.58
Mike
Like heating, cooking our food, heating our house, you know, whatever, lighting our way through whatever fucking world we're in. um Fire, you know, is it a torch or is it fucking every tree around us burning?

00:35:10.71
Mike
um Yeah.

00:35:10.91
Bill
Right.

00:35:11.99
Mike
You know, so that, that is managing the fire and managing the fear. um Yeah. Shit. I like that a lot.

00:35:19.19
Bill
Yeah. And it's, i mean, you know, changing the, just the word managed doesn't change the power of that quote. Cause you know, if you read it as, you know, fear is like fire.

00:35:23.49
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:35:26.07
Bill
If you can manage it, it can cook for you, heat your house, blah, blah, blah.

00:35:28.82
Mike
Right, right.

00:35:29.43
Bill
If you can't manage it, it will burn everything, you know, around you and destroy you.

00:35:31.45
Mike
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah, right.

00:35:34.15
Bill
So it doesn't take away from, I don't think it takes away from the power of that at all.

00:35:38.03
Mike
Mm-mm.

00:35:39.00
Bill
And ah to your point, I like, that's the only, I didn't, I didn't like the control part.

00:35:43.99
Mike
Right.

00:35:45.05
Bill
I didn't like the word, the concept, everything else is fine with it.

00:35:46.64
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:35:48.37
Bill
But I wasn't even thinking of another word necessarily to replace it. But I do like I like the word manage. But yeah, that's a it was a great quote.

00:35:54.26
Mike
Yeah.

00:35:55.61
Bill
and Whatever. I can't think of the the dude's name. It doesn't matter. I had to look it up.

00:35:59.13
Mike
Mm hmm.

00:35:59.98
Bill
Rogan cut it a little bit. He didn't have it completely. He had the like 90 percent of the gist of it. but I wanted to get the exact quote.

00:36:05.31
Mike
Mm hmm.

00:36:07.06
Bill
So I looked it up, but yeah, I just saw it.

00:36:07.42
Mike
Right.

00:36:09.70
Bill
um I'm like, that's fucking awesome. I really

00:36:11.96
Mike
It is.

00:36:12.95
Bill
man I really like it. So um yeah, anyone, if you want to, if you want to look it up to get the exact quote, just um literally all I did, I did a search for Mike Tyson's trainer and fear quote.

00:36:23.31
Bill
And I think it, I got it right away.

00:36:23.86
Mike
hmm.

00:36:25.19
Bill
So it's um apparently a popular quote that I've never fucking heard before.

00:36:25.40
Mike
Right.

00:36:29.14
Mike
Yeah, and I hadn't either.

00:36:31.73
Bill
yeah So, so anyhow, you're welcome everyone.

00:36:35.10
Mike
Yes. Thank you, Mike Tyson's trainer.

00:36:36.82
Bill
um Yeah, exactly. Whoever, whoever the hell you are.

00:36:40.50
Mike
And Lunkhead Joe Rogan.

00:36:43.45
Bill
Yeah. So and I, I'll talk ah if, if we get time, i'll I'll tell you a couple of things from, I'm i'm telling you, I, I am enjoying.

00:36:46.03
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:36:50.21
Bill
um I just, I enjoy that. I enjoy everything I've said before there. He's got 20, don't even know, 2,400, 2,500 episodes.

00:36:59.16
Mike
Sure.

00:36:59.71
Bill
And um nine times that like I listened to Ethan Hawke the other day. That was one of his newer ones. And um Ethan Hawke is kind of a fucking brainiac, and I had no idea.

00:37:05.46
Mike
Right.

00:37:08.95
Mike
yes

00:37:09.43
Bill
it was just It was interesting. I mean, they were like it was this whole almost like a philosophical conversation back and forth, but also talked about real shit, but just interesting.

00:37:16.66
Mike
Right.

00:37:17.75
Bill
But, I mean, I could flip back. you know I could go from episode 2400 down to like 2200 until I find somebody I want to listen to. So he's got random, random people on there.

00:37:25.72
Mike
Right.

00:37:28.43
Bill
Either I don't know the names or I'm like, don't have to listen to this fucker, you know, that sort of thing.

00:37:31.54
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:37:32.99
Bill
But the ones that I had listened to, I, again, I've gotten something out of it.

00:37:33.40
Mike
Right.

00:37:37.59
Bill
So that is what it is.

00:37:38.10
Mike
Cool.

00:37:39.34
Bill
But um all right. So there was a, and speaking of the fear thing, there was another thing I wrote down. um i don't remember. I guess I don't even have this from a reading. I don't know.

00:37:49.80
Bill
So there was a string.

00:37:50.20
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:37:50.80
Bill
Oh, there was a string of readings lately, duh, about faith and specifically faith over fear.

00:37:53.64
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:37:56.92
Bill
um

00:37:57.20
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:37:58.01
Bill
How did you learn to deal with fear and how did faith win out? So to to begin with, and I mean, kind of along those the same lines is what you know we realize that fear is there. But back to the beginning, that was kind of my point.

00:38:10.49
Bill
It it brought me back to so many readings about this. It made me think about, you know, again, the beginning, the early days and things like that.

00:38:13.39
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:38:16.81
Bill
And I mean, fuck, I didn't really realize that fear was such a big part of my life until, what, a year ago, you know, two years ago.

00:38:23.56
Mike
Right.

00:38:23.99
Bill
You know, so how did you learn to deal with that with that fear either immediately over time? And in where did you get to the point where you think that faith? and I don't know if went out is the right word where, you know, again, faith over fear type of thing.

00:38:36.79
Mike
Mm-hmm. Sure, sure. um You know, examples, um you know, I mean, doing inventories and truly looking at, you know, myself and whatever, you know, being...

00:38:52.15
Mike
you know, shit that I'm scared of, um you know, and then learning to face up to it and walk through it. And, you know, time and time again, walking through that fear, getting to the other side of it and going, well, that was fucking, I overblew that, you know, built it way fucking way too much of my head.

00:38:59.61
Bill
Right.

00:39:11.93
Mike
um Again, the example of it over and over again, walking through that fear, getting to the other side and going, well, fuck. That wasn't that bad. um So, yeah, that's, you know, kind of ah the the practical thing.

00:39:21.40
Bill
Right.

00:39:27.35
Mike
um Yeah, you know, and just ah learning to learning to trust and learning to, you know, people telling, you know, over and over, hey, man, it's not that bad. It's going to be okay.

00:39:38.39
Mike
You know, just keep doing what you're supposed to do and it's going to be all right. Well, fuck, I guess. Hey, thanks for not lying to me.

00:39:48.25
Bill
Yeah. And, that you know, and that's, that's maybe that, maybe that is exactly what it, well, I'm not even maybe, I think that that is exactly what it takes. I mean, people can say, don't worry, it'll be okay, kid.

00:39:58.30
Mike
Right.

00:39:58.53
Bill
Everything's gonna be fine. You know, put the arm around you and it'll, it'll it'll be good.

00:39:59.51
Mike
Right.

00:40:02.05
Bill
you get You'll be okay. And, you know, follow me, all those sorts of things.

00:40:05.30
Mike
aha

00:40:06.11
Bill
But until you see it work or you, until you see that something bad did not happen or even better that not only did something not bad happen, but something good happened.

00:40:17.70
Bill
And almost said good or good.

00:40:18.01
Mike
right Right.

00:40:21.76
Bill
And you thought it might be,

00:40:22.68
Mike
Right.

00:40:24.21
Bill
But I mean, like we talked about that before, that not only does it turn out to be better, but I mean, at at least eight out of 10 times, it's better than we thought it might be. You know, so I mean, once once you get that that experience or that those examples, like you said, you know, of walking through it, it does.

00:40:36.89
Mike
o

00:40:41.25
Bill
I mean, you know, i haven't having that faith, ah faith tends that tends to win out. It was funny too, yesterday, um Kathy's friend Shelly was over for for Christmas and I know you've met Shelly before.

00:40:49.52
Mike
Mm-hmm. Sure.

00:40:51.21
Bill
Um, but, uh, you know, she had told, uh, cause she was there for Thanksgiving too. And Kathy had, oh, that's right.

00:40:56.06
Mike
Yeah.

00:40:57.29
Bill
Yeah. You were there. I forget you were there this, this year.

00:40:57.91
Mike
I was there.

00:40:59.85
Bill
yeah Oh yeah. Mike, you know, Thanksgiving. Yeah.

00:41:02.01
Mike
Yeah, yeah.

00:41:02.17
Bill
You know,

00:41:02.93
Mike
A month ago. Mm-hmm.

00:41:04.63
Bill
Right. So, well, you know, she, Kathy had brought up about my procedure or whatever. So she knew about it and she knew I was going in for the other.

00:41:09.29
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:41:11.28
Bill
And so she had he asked me, she's like, i don't have anything going on. I'm it's good. You know, Kathy came down, we were telling that whole story. And then, you know, she said it, well, it had to be so nice having somebody there. And I said, it was, it was, you know, like same thing we were, you and I were just talking about.

00:41:20.22
Mike
Hmm. Yeah. Right.

00:41:24.08
Bill
um And I said, I said, it was, you know, funny. though I was fine and blah, blah, blah. And whatever. um but somehow it came up she's like you know it had to be so much different the first time she said you know ah two things she said being there by yourself and she goes you had to be just just really scared and i said you know what i wasn't she said why not and i said well here's the thing i said the only time that i was that i was nerve-wracked a little bit and um unsure and anxious maybe on the verge of being scared is before they fucking told me what they were going to do.

00:41:36.61
Mike
Mm hmm.

00:41:42.78
Mike
he

00:41:57.22
Bill
You know, i had, I had this, you know, this fucking weird ass ER doctor and everyone's doing this and everyone's this flurry of activity and nobody's telling me, everybody just wants to know my fucking story.

00:41:57.56
Mike
a

00:42:05.82
Mike
Right.

00:42:07.30
Bill
You know, um, tell me what, what's going to be done and when, you know,

00:42:10.87
Mike
Right. Yeah.

00:42:12.79
Bill
And I said, once I found that out, I said, I said, I can't, I literally cannot deal with the unknown.

00:42:19.09
Mike
Yeah.

00:42:19.19
Bill
ah I mean, I can't physically um and mentally, I can't deal with it. But I mean, I can't deal with it. I can't, there's nothing I can do with what I don't know.

00:42:27.90
Mike
Right.

00:42:28.31
Bill
Once I know, even if it's fucking horrible, at least I know what it is and I can put a plan in place on how to deal with it.

00:42:31.10
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:42:34.87
Mike
Yep.

00:42:34.87
Bill
And I'm like, ah that the procedure, I'm like, I, not that I ever researched a goddamn thing, but I've heard enough. And I said, even open heart surgery, and it's, it's more of a commonplace thing.

00:42:41.60
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:42:44.47
Bill
So I said, I wasn't worried about that.

00:42:46.20
Mike
Right.

00:42:46.98
Bill
But it was the unknown that was fucking me up, you know?

00:42:49.62
Mike
Uh-huh. Yeah.

00:42:50.36
Bill
um But I mean, beyond that, I mean, yeah, it was so creepy, like I said on here, you know, being wheeled into that first, you know, operating room. And it's just, you know, it's like a horror movie. It's just fucking clean and it's white and it's silver. And you're like, meh.

00:43:03.45
Bill
You know, but I wasn't scared, you know? It was just it was just unnerving, you know?

00:43:07.54
Mike
Yeah.

00:43:07.73
Bill
um but But that's the thing, you know, I've learned over time that I just, just tell me what the fuck the deal is. You know, I can handle it.

00:43:15.26
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:43:16.71
Bill
If it, if it's, I don't care if it's, well, of course and everyone cares and it's bad. You know it's not that I don't care that it's not bad, but even if it's something bad, i need to know, just fucking tell me, fucking tell me that that's the only way I can process.

00:43:21.56
Mike
Right.

00:43:27.86
Mike
Yeah. Yeah.

00:43:30.98
Bill
And then, then I can make a plan. If you, I can't, I can't be just, you know, willy nilly out in the fucking whim of whatever.

00:43:33.47
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:43:37.40
Mike
Yeah.

00:43:38.62
Bill
i gotta know. That's all, you know?

00:43:39.48
Mike
Right. Yeah. Yeah. Let me know what the fuck's going on so that I can deal with it, how I have to deal with it.

00:43:42.46
Bill
i

00:43:45.91
Mike
Exactly.

00:43:46.36
Bill
Yeah. Yeah. But, um, I, I liked the way you said it. I mean, seriously, when you had said, you know, once you walk through these things, uh, you know, a couple of times, and of course, you know, thank, thank you for that lie to me. That's fucking great.

00:43:56.69
Bill
Um, you know, to everyone that's, uh, that's come before us and yeah, I mean, nobody, nobody's lied to us, you know, nobody's out there.

00:43:57.00
Mike
He-he-he-he.

00:44:02.25
Mike
Yeah.

00:44:03.19
Bill
They're going, Hey, Hey kid, it's good to get better.

00:44:04.83
Mike
Right. Yeah. Right.

00:44:05.51
Bill
And then, you know, we're all fucked it you know, at year seven, you know, the fucking bottom drops out.

00:44:06.90
Mike
the

00:44:11.06
Bill
You didn't fucking tell me that.

00:44:11.26
Mike
right

00:44:12.50
Bill
Oh yeah. We forgot.

00:44:15.86
Bill
But no, and nobody's lied and everyone's, you know, we've we've heard plenty of stories, but, um but yeah, and it's, I think that's a, that's a great way to put it though. i But I do like that once you've walked through this stuff a couple of times, even if it's not the same exact circumstance, at least you got a little bit of a base in there.

00:44:27.99
Mike
right

00:44:30.06
Bill
Right.

00:44:30.58
Mike
Yeah, exactly. I mean, there's, there's again, what five subjects and yeah, right. There's always so many different figure configurations of all this nonsense and right. It's all about the same.

00:44:44.25
Bill
Right. Yeah, I agree. So I think it's probably a good time for a break. And then do you want to talk about Rob Reiner at all?

00:44:52.73
Mike
We could do that. Uh-huh.

00:44:53.99
Bill
OK, because I I wrote some I've got some I've got some thoughts and I'm sure you do, too.

00:44:58.70
Mike
Sure.

00:44:59.52
Bill
And i ah but anyway, we don't have to bring it all up.

00:44:59.86
Mike
Sure.

00:45:01.79
Bill
And I just I wrote it down. So but just figured that obviously it's going be more than a five minute conversation.

00:45:03.51
Mike
Yeah.

00:45:06.24
Bill
So probably ah a wonderful time to maybe take a break. What do you think?

00:45:09.69
Mike
I think so. All right. Well, we'll be back with more Sober Not Mature right after these words from our sponsors.

00:45:25.37
Bill
All right, everyone. Welcome back. And now, ladies and gentlemen, it's on to Meathead.

00:45:31.45
Mike
Right.

00:45:33.66
Bill
So, um I mean, I don't know. I think i it'd be it'd be hard.

00:45:36.52
Mike
Hmm.

00:45:37.94
Bill
I think it'd be hard pressed. to I can't say that everyone you know knows who Rob or knew who Rob Reiner was, but is there anyone out there that that doesn't know about what you know what fucking happened to Rob Reiner?

00:45:43.49
Mike
Hmm.

00:45:46.87
Mike
Hasn't.

00:45:47.72
Bill
Yeah.

00:45:47.90
Mike
Right. and And is there anybody out there that hasn't seen one of his movies or whatever? Right. Exactly. I mean, he did.

00:45:53.88
Bill
Yeah.

00:45:54.38
Mike
He did so much and and so much of it was really fucking good.

00:45:59.13
Bill
Right.

00:45:59.70
Mike
Yeah.

00:46:00.06
Bill
but Well, you know, and even like after the fact, when they were talking about the movies and um once again, you know, some somebody says that, you know, who's your I don't know, it's ah a name, your favorite director.

00:46:11.02
Bill
I mean, there there's obviously there's Rob Reiner, there's, you know, Ron Howard, there's Scorsese, of course.

00:46:11.76
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:46:15.66
Bill
I mean, there's. There's Spielberg. There's all these fucking people out there, um you know, and then it's just you, you know, some of these movies like, I mean, I'm not saying that I that I know all the Martin Scorsese movies, but um I mean, when one's brought up, I'm like, oh, yeah, fuck, that was a Scorsese movie or, you know, anything like that.

00:46:19.06
Mike
Uh-huh.

00:46:26.79
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:46:30.74
Mike
Right.

00:46:33.29
Bill
Or, you know, I remember that Ron Howard did this one or that one or that one. But you start watching some of these things. I'm like, you know, like somebody brought up on, it's either on the radio or on one of the podcasts I was listening to that Misery was Rob Reiner.

00:46:46.20
Mike
Yeah.

00:46:46.47
Bill
And I'm like, I didn't fucking remember that.

00:46:46.91
Mike
Yep.

00:46:49.10
Bill
ah I know the movie.

00:46:49.56
Mike
Uh-huh.

00:46:50.25
Bill
It's fucking wonderful.

00:46:50.52
Mike
Right.

00:46:51.40
Bill
It's great.

00:46:51.68
Mike
Of course. Yeah.

00:46:52.59
Bill
Yeah. You know, but I'm like, Jesus Christ. And then it just it always cracked me up that. Yeah, I mean, it again, if if you don't know, I mean, if somebody might hopefully would know now after all the shit that happened.

00:47:04.15
Bill
But, you know, yeah go back and watch, you know, all in the family. I mean, he was he was a fucking, you know, it literally his nickname from Archie Bucker was, you know, fucking meathead.

00:47:07.84
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:47:12.43
Bill
You know, it was his son in law.

00:47:12.90
Mike
Right.

00:47:13.95
Bill
He called him fucking meathead. Which, I mean, you know, Mike and I, we we grew up watching a goddamn TV show. And then this guy becomes, you know, this this fucking infamous, you know, director.

00:47:21.24
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:47:24.61
Bill
And then, you know, God, it's this ungodly death.

00:47:24.86
Mike
Right.

00:47:26.97
Bill
But, yeah, like you said, I mean, just he did he did so much and things that I just didn't, again, a lot of it I didn't remember and I didn't realize. But i knew i knew the magn magnitude of who he was as an individual and a director that much.

00:47:38.55
Mike
Sure.

00:47:39.84
Bill
Clearly, I knew.

00:47:40.30
Mike
Right. Yeah, right. Exactly. um You know... I mean, he came, you know, Nepo Baby. I mean, his dad was Carl Reiner. He was buddies, best friends with Mill Brooks.

00:47:47.23
Bill
Right.

00:47:49.16
Mike
And, you know, I mean, just huge legacy of comedy in that family. Yeah. Which is so fucked up that it ended so tragic.

00:47:57.05
Bill
Right. Yeah. And, you know, the the thing with is and I'll be honest, when I when I heard because, you know, this is the the headline. i don't know if you read the early headline before it was, you know, obviously let or made public.

00:48:06.18
Mike
Hmm.

00:48:08.84
Bill
But it's like, you know, two people found dead at, you know, movie mogul Rob Reiner's home and, you know, 78 year old male and a whatever year old female.

00:48:09.34
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:48:11.93
Mike
Right.

00:48:15.06
Mike
Right.

00:48:19.69
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:48:19.99
Bill
And immediately I looked up the, you know, how old's Rob Reiner? 78.

00:48:22.42
Mike
Right.

00:48:22.67
Bill
I'm like, fuck. How old's his wife?

00:48:23.79
Mike
Yup.

00:48:24.83
Bill
70. Fuck.

00:48:24.85
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:48:25.51
Bill
So, you know, when I'm, my first thought was, um, Phil Hartman situation.

00:48:25.73
Mike
Yup.

00:48:29.07
Bill
I'm like, I don't know who his fucking wife is, but I'm like, she fucking went nuts.

00:48:29.56
Mike
Yeah. Mm-hmm.

00:48:32.59
Bill
She fucking killed him and killed herself as a murder suicide again.

00:48:33.65
Mike
Mm. Right.

00:48:36.25
Bill
You know, and it's terrible to think that, but that's that's what I thought. I never thought that, you know, either either it was a random type of thing or, I mean, God forbid it was one of his fucking kids, you know, which um i don't even I don't even know that I knew.

00:48:39.75
Mike
Mm.

00:48:43.19
Mike
Right.

00:48:46.71
Mike
Yeah.

00:48:50.79
Bill
I'm pretty sure I didn't know anything about his son.

00:48:54.20
Mike
Right.

00:48:54.30
Bill
I don't think I knew anything about his son, Nick.

00:48:54.44
Mike
Yeah. Yeah. Me neither.

00:48:58.74
Bill
So I don't know. I mean, there was a the couple of things that came up. Well, first of all, I mean, I guess over over time, i mean he was he was clearly one of one of us, not a treated necessarily one of us, or at least not, I don't think currently a treated one of us.

00:49:07.59
Mike
Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Mm hmm.

00:49:12.45
Bill
He was treated, but in a different way.

00:49:12.60
Mike
Right.

00:49:14.13
Bill
um But I mean, I guess in and out of rehabs, alcohol and drug abuse, basically from what I from what i understand, bits and pieces is that you know they just they kept you know trying to do everything they could to keep them out of trouble.

00:49:17.18
Mike
Yep. Mm-hmm.

00:49:26.88
Mike
Sure. Mm-hmm.

00:49:27.55
Bill
There was that movie that Rob Reiner did. and i can't Now I can't remember the name of it with him.

00:49:30.78
Mike
Uh-huh. Something about Charlie.

00:49:34.01
Bill
Yeah, it might have been, yeah, something might have been about Charlie or something, yeah.

00:49:34.17
Mike
Yeah. ah Yeah, it's I know Charlie's in the title, but yeah, right.

00:49:41.37
Bill
But it was kind of a...

00:49:41.62
Mike
Yeah, which id I had actually never heard of the movie, and um yeah. You know, um, I, I kind of don't want to watch it now. Um, you know, and, and from what I've, I did read some about it and whatever.

00:49:49.08
Bill
Right.

00:49:52.98
Mike
and it's, yeah, yeah. You know, you basic, um, you know, Hollywood version of what we are, which is never right. So

00:50:01.86
Bill
Right.

00:50:04.09
Mike
yeah. Um, yeah, yeah, I know. Shit. um Yeah, and you know, and clearly um the mental illness, it wasn't just substance abuse and and and whatever, being an alcoholic or a drug addict.

00:50:15.52
Bill
Right.

00:50:17.88
Mike
um There was more, you know, as there is with a lot of us, um you know, a lot of times, you know, that the alcoholism and drug abuse comes from trying to self-medicate your fucked up head, um you know, which I can certainly relate to on some levels, but not that level, thankfully.

00:50:33.00
Bill
Right.

00:50:37.54
Mike
Yeah. Um, yeah, you know, yeah, it's, it's, it's horrible.

00:50:44.22
Bill
So there was, um and I forgot that I, Let's save this article, but let's see. And that's giving me a fucking redirect.

00:50:52.18
Mike
Of course.

00:50:53.59
Bill
um So this was, a yeah, just again, random thing that popped up that I, that I saw after I made, I wrote down a couple other things I want to kind of touch on, but um so he was apparently diagnosed with, this is Nick Reiner, Rob Reiner's son, diagnosed with schizophrenia before his parents' murders.

00:51:07.78
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:51:12.44
Mike
Right.

00:51:13.21
Bill
Um, Obviously found a reveal that Nick was diagnosed with schizophrenia. And in the weeks before his parents murdered murders, there was a change in his medications that he was taking, which had allegedly made him more erratic and dangerous.

00:51:25.12
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:51:28.95
Bill
And I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? um

00:51:31.38
Mike
of

00:51:32.78
Bill
Sources told TMC, Nick had been under the care of psychologists, psychiatrists, I'm sorry, blah, blah. Month murders, behavior reportedly changed for the worse. Outlook claimed that the doctors were working to adjust medications, but did not receive the results they were looking for.

00:51:49.32
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:51:49.59
Bill
So he had dealt with addiction from a young teen, 22, blah, blah, blah, blah. Oh yeah, Being Charlie is the name of the movie.

00:51:56.95
Mike
Yeah, that's it.

00:51:57.98
Bill
Um, yes, something about Barry, something about Charlie.

00:52:01.14
Mike
Something about Charlie, right?

00:52:01.15
Bill
Yeah, that's what it was. Yes. It's the same goddamn thing. But so, so that was, that was number one. So they, and I, I, I'm like, Jesus Christ, really? He's diagnosed with schizophrenia.

00:52:13.24
Bill
The medicine's not fucking working.

00:52:13.47
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:52:14.96
Bill
Why is this?

00:52:15.27
Mike
Right.

00:52:17.56
Mike
Yeah.

00:52:17.69
Bill
Why? I mean, why, why, why is he out on the fucking streets? You know?

00:52:21.18
Mike
Right. Yeah.

00:52:21.82
Bill
Um, I mean,

00:52:22.06
Mike
Well, I, well, bad yeah speculation purely on my part, but you know, i did they, they can handle it. They will take care of it. You know?

00:52:32.53
Mike
um Yeah.

00:52:32.82
Bill
Right. Right.

00:52:34.33
Mike
You know, listen um again, not asking for help, to you know, ego and, you know, it's just cause you're not one of us doesn't mean you don't suffer from those sorts of things. ah Yeah, you know, I would imagine they went, well, you know, we'll just keep working on it until it gets better. And sometimes it doesn't.

00:52:53.91
Bill
Right. Yeah. just, I don't know. Part of me is just like, you know, that I, I, I would think these days and, and I, and I don't know, thankfully. um and And I think I can speak for you on this because unless you're a, unless you're a, you're a, you're closet medicated guy over there.

00:53:07.60
Bill
But um I mean, neither one of us have had to deal with, you know, mental health issues to the point of having medication.

00:53:07.76
Mike
Hmm.

00:53:10.71
Mike
Right. Mm-hmm.

00:53:14.23
Bill
Every, I think everyone has mental health issues.

00:53:14.45
Mike
Sure.

00:53:16.71
Bill
I think everyone's affected in one way, shape or form by life or whatever.

00:53:21.11
Mike
Sure.

00:53:21.23
Bill
we've We've had endless conversations about what we think about trauma. And if nothing else, we don't, just to make this clear forever, we don't think that that anything that happened in our lives, quote unquote, trauma based, made us who we are as far as alcoholics or whatever.

00:53:25.56
Mike
me

00:53:36.82
Bill
you know Neither one of us agree with that statement.

00:53:36.92
Mike
Right.

00:53:39.38
Bill
And personally, I hate the fact that it seems like everyone, not everyone, a large percentage of the the addicted or drinking or or using society these days, everyone's looking for some place to point it to.

00:53:49.72
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:53:52.31
Mike
Right.

00:53:52.89
Bill
and And I don't think it needs to be pointed to. It just needs to be fucking dealt with.

00:53:55.46
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:53:56.61
Bill
And who gives a fuck what got you there?

00:53:56.79
Mike
Yes.

00:53:58.65
Bill
Fucking fix it.

00:53:58.88
Mike
Yeah.

00:53:59.97
Bill
There are solutions out there, right?

00:54:00.16
Mike
Uh-huh. Right. Exactly.

00:54:02.07
Bill
oh Okay. So, um but these days when it comes to mental health issues, I i thought, or I would have thought, especially at that at that level, I mean, at that income level and that, you know, exposure level, you know, of of that prominent of a family that, you know, that's when, you know, they put them in, you know, again.

00:54:08.07
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:54:12.95
Mike
Mm-hmm. Sure.

00:54:21.02
Bill
you know, some fucking resort rehab, not rehab, but you know what i mean, a resort clinic and get get him or her, whoever they may be, in a safe place and until they get the medicine straightened out.

00:54:23.64
Mike
a Yeah, right. Yeah.

00:54:32.06
Mike
Yeah. Mm-hmm.

00:54:34.10
Bill
I just don't, that so that I don't understand. i don't i don't know that that'll ever be answered, but maybe it will be.

00:54:38.55
Mike
Right.

00:54:39.34
Bill
um

00:54:39.55
Mike
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

00:54:41.08
Bill
But the other thing was, now you know that, I mean, clearly it was the the fight at Conan O'Brien's Christmas party.

00:54:48.11
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:54:48.44
Bill
Okay. So did you have, did, had you ever heard of Conan's party before?

00:54:52.57
Mike
No.

00:54:53.78
Bill
the The only reason I have is because I've listened to Conan's podcast and handful of others where people talk about that.

00:54:58.14
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:55:01.54
Bill
And sometimes jokingly, it's like, oh, you're invited to Conan's.

00:55:01.82
Mike
Okay.

00:55:05.30
Bill
I was invited to Conan's, you know, this and that.

00:55:07.16
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:55:07.22
Bill
tell They, the, the Hollywood, usually the comedians and shit like that. They're, they're fucking with their friends that their friend didn't get invited because apparently it is, it is the party of the year.

00:55:11.58
Mike
Right.

00:55:14.79
Mike
Uh-huh.

00:55:18.11
Bill
And it's a Christmas party to to be at.

00:55:18.36
Mike
Okay.

00:55:20.75
Bill
And I guess Conan puts on this big fucking thing and he's done it for fucking ever, you know.

00:55:25.79
Mike
Great.

00:55:26.17
Bill
um And it just sounds it is it's kind of a Hollywood elite, you know, big deal and everyone gets together and blah, blah, blah.

00:55:30.77
Mike
Mm-hmm. Right.

00:55:33.63
Bill
So what, from what I heard and from what I read is that, you know, the obviously the somehow, and I, I still haven't, I haven't heard how fucking Nick Reiner got in or whether he was invited or whatever the deal was with it.

00:55:38.04
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:55:47.74
Bill
Clearly he was there. um

00:55:48.98
Mike
Right. Well, no, from what I heard is they took him along because they didn't want to leave him at home.

00:55:54.78
Bill
oh okay. Okay. So he, okay.

00:55:56.41
Mike
Yeah.

00:55:56.86
Bill
So they brought him along. Okay.

00:55:57.88
Mike
Yeah. Yeah.

00:55:59.16
Bill
And i hit I hadn't heard that because like, did he just show up? You know, so, well, that that kind of clears that part up.

00:56:01.88
Mike
me No. Yeah. Yeah.

00:56:04.16
Bill
Okay, understood. And then, um I mean, it's not well given given that, then there was probably some sort of fight that carried over because there was a huge screaming fight, blah, blah, blah, blah.

00:56:11.16
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:56:13.56
Mike
Right.

00:56:13.99
Bill
blah And I get, well, two things. So Bill Hader gets the comedian gets drawn into this because apparently Nick um rolled up to him and he's having a private, he's having a conversation with somebody and he just says, you know, listen, dude, you know, it's a private conversation, got to be gone with you type of thing.

00:56:18.42
Mike
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

00:56:23.51
Mike
Yeah. Uh-huh.

00:56:29.11
Mike
Right.

00:56:31.10
Bill
Which, no I heard, again, other people talking about this.

00:56:31.18
Mike
Yeah.

00:56:35.63
Bill
Like, why is Bill Hader being even brought into a conversation? So what?

00:56:39.99
Mike
Yeah.

00:56:40.43
Bill
This this fucking lunatic could have went up to anyone. So why did why does Bill Hader now, for the rest of his fucking life, have to be associated with Rob Ryder's death?

00:56:43.32
Mike
Yeah.

00:56:49.93
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:56:50.17
Bill
Because that's what it is. he's It's going to be it's a it's a nothing else is a cliff note to, you know, to to the whole thing.

00:56:54.81
Mike
Yeah.

00:56:56.49
Bill
And then the thing that that really kind of threw me off and I I'm I'm sure somebody's going to there's got to be a I'm sure they question Conan to this point and had anyone else around there.

00:57:06.52
Bill
But supposedly Conan told we're telling people you do not call the cops.

00:57:06.89
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:57:11.86
Mike
Right.

00:57:12.79
Bill
And if that's the case, that's a problem.

00:57:15.03
Mike
is

00:57:15.31
Bill
um I mean, wouldn't you think? I mean, if somebody's going fucking nuts like that, you know, and I'm...

00:57:20.18
Mike
Right. Well, again, ah you know, the parents probably going, we've got this, we'll handle it.

00:57:21.26
Bill
Right.

00:57:26.24
Mike
You know, I'm sorry.

00:57:27.13
Bill
Right.

00:57:27.68
Mike
You know, we we'll, we'll take care of it. Yeah. You know? Yeah. I mean, that's the only thing that makes sense from any standpoint, right?

00:57:35.99
Bill
Right.

00:57:36.10
Mike
You know, Rob Reiner is saying he'll handle it. Okay. We'll let them handle it then.

00:57:41.85
Bill
Yeah. So then Conan's up saying that nobody, nobody call it's, it's handled, but maybe it's because the way it came, way it came down and that, that would be, if it turns out to be that, that would make more sense than, you know, cause I mean, if, if it's just Conan being like, i don't want my party, my party fucked up, you know, because the cops come here and they're, you know, questioning, you know, two or 300 people, and you know, then fucking party's done.

00:57:44.85
Mike
Mm-hmm. Right.

00:57:52.08
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:57:56.95
Mike
Right.

00:58:01.85
Mike
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

00:58:02.79
Bill
which that that's the part that seemed fucking odd to me, but it would make, I would like to go with the, with the version of the Rob, Rob and his wife said that, you know,

00:58:06.23
Mike
Yeah.

00:58:09.46
Mike
Yeah. I mean, well, you know, it's, you know, whatever. They have lots of money and a lot of people know who they are, but they're just fucking people. So, I mean, you know, they're acting like any other people.

00:58:16.96
Bill
right.

00:58:19.54
Mike
Right.

00:58:21.93
Bill
Right. Yeah, it would, I don't know. It's just that the whole thing's fucked up, but I guess it would make, it would make a lot more sense. That would be kind of, I almost said the word comforting, but I i think it would, it'd be, it would almost be more comforting if, you know, rather than having just, you know, Conan O'Brien or anyone be like, you know, don't call the cops, man.

00:58:38.55
Mike
yeah Yeah, right. is. Sure. Right.

00:58:40.17
Bill
stay cool we'll call the popo stay cool but uh yeah don't mean to laugh about it but i mean jesus christ it just it's a it's a messed up mess you know and i mean i mean all of it uh all it makes a little bit more sense i mean i i didn't hear that um that they took them longer that i mean that that makes more sense because i i didn't it never made any sense to me like how the fuck did even get there

00:58:41.02
Mike
a

00:58:48.09
Mike
a

00:58:50.90
Mike
it is

00:59:01.91
Mike
right

00:59:03.19
Bill
But yeah, I mean, it's ah because they yeah I flipped through something and I was trying to read an article and I ended up with um some YouTube clip of this, again, a podcaster through Sirius XM, whatever.

00:59:14.42
Bill
know the guy was, but he was the one that was talking about, you know, why does Bill Hader's name have to be dragged into this type of thing?

00:59:20.13
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:59:20.18
Bill
um But he had said that he goes, he goes, he goes, think about this. He goes, Rob Reiner dying is tragic enough. You know, if he just would have died, you know, was just Rob Reiner passed away.

00:59:30.58
Bill
That's it's fucking bad enough.

00:59:30.78
Mike
Sure.

00:59:32.02
Bill
But then this, and I'm like, I'm like, God,

00:59:33.59
Mike
Yeah.

00:59:36.06
Bill
Damn, that's so true. Because, again, everything that he did and everything that he was, I mean, you know, people are get people are getting older. You know, I mean, people people die.

00:59:44.01
Mike
Right.

00:59:44.50
Bill
You know, people die.

00:59:45.11
Mike
Mm-hmm.

00:59:45.42
Bill
it's It is what it is. but But Jesus Christ, I mean, what a fucking mess.

00:59:49.66
Mike
Yeah.

00:59:50.39
Bill
Just what a goddamn mess.

00:59:50.49
Mike
Yeah.

00:59:51.59
Bill
so

00:59:52.47
Mike
Yeah. Right. You know, I mean, mental illness, you know, I mean, clearly yeah i know they keep referring to this guy as, you know, a drug addict and blah, blah, blah, which clearly he was, but, um,

01:00:01.89
Bill
Right.

01:00:02.68
Mike
Again, self-medicating, you know, that yeah, he had mental problems. And, um you know, I mean, we we all know people who have gone through this stuff.

01:00:13.84
Mike
I mean, I've got friends in the program who, you know, go to outside help and and they take medications and stuff. And that's cool, man, you know. um and they're doing what they need to do to keep themselves healthy for the people around them um and if that includes getting extra help and you know they're working the program they're doing what they have to do on that side of it and then you know they got little little screwy things going on in their heads too they they take medications to get help for that so you know that's that's all good yeah but like you said man why this guy wasn't

01:00:27.72
Bill
Right.

01:00:46.71
Mike
you know, more supervised, but I just, my feeling and again, speculation is, you know, um, you got a guy who's very powerful, powerful and, you know, a director, right.

01:00:59.26
Mike
What does the book say about directors, you know, that we, we, are right.

01:01:01.69
Bill
Right? Eh.

01:01:03.66
Mike
I mean, that's the kind of person he is, was, and, and, you know, so he's going to take care of it. He's going to handle it. And he had been for a long time. And, Just, ah you know, ego, man.

01:01:16.28
Mike
Ego bite bites all of us in the ass.

01:01:19.32
Bill
Right. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. It is and like you said, too. It's ah it's like therapy therapy these days. It's ah it's it's not I mean, even at the time that that we got sober, which, you know, again, not that long ago, you know, 15 plus years ago.

01:01:26.27
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:01:33.69
Mike
Right.

01:01:34.22
Bill
um But I I'm not saying that therapy wasn't as accepted then. But these days, you know, if somebody says they you know, I'm i'm going to a therapist, it's like they're they telling you they went to the grocery store.

01:01:38.43
Mike
Mm-hmm. Right.

01:01:44.56
Bill
You know, it's no big deal.

01:01:44.95
Mike
Yeah.

01:01:46.03
Bill
Well, you were hungry. Of course you did. You know,

01:01:48.02
Mike
Right.

01:01:48.22
Bill
yeah yeah You got to go talk to somebody.

01:01:48.39
Mike
Yeah.

01:01:49.50
Bill
Well, of course you did. You know, there's there's all these online things and, you know, better help. And that's the one that's all advertised all over the place on all these podcasts.

01:01:54.01
Mike
Yeah.

01:01:56.90
Bill
And, you know, all these things are are available. And, you know, you and I talked about that one of the episodes, whatever the fuck it was. um i mean i've gone to couples counseling i went to had to go to a you know a counselor when i was going through my second divorce a whole because the custody thing with clearly my drinking that i was trying trying to cover up um and uh but you know the the thing of it is if if i um if i was to the point or if i ever got to the point where i thought That, you know, therapy would if I needed or felt that I needed something to talk to somebody like that, I wouldn't have fucking in a fucking heartbeat.

01:02:15.12
Mike
Mm hmm.

01:02:30.47
Mike
Mm hmm. Mm hmm.

01:02:34.71
Bill
I would, you know, because um I don't know if it it is.

01:02:35.41
Mike
Sure.

01:02:38.39
Bill
It's a matter of, you know, maybe it's because, number one, I don't think it's even society except this because I give a flying fuck what everyone else out there cares That's the first thing I was going to say, maybe is and it's not.

01:02:45.37
Mike
Right?

01:02:48.87
Bill
But I mean, these days it's just is more common. But that wouldn't that wouldn't be why I would do it. The reason I would do it is because I've been made to feel comfortable.

01:02:53.74
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:02:57.88
Bill
I think we have been made to feel comfortable that that's ah not only a viable option, it's ah it's an intelligent option if we need it.

01:03:00.38
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:03:04.51
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:03:06.84
Bill
by the, by the people that we were, you know, that we've been affiliated with, associated with, raised by, guided by over the years that, you know, and if we got to take medication, got to go to the doctor, you got to do whatever it is.

01:03:10.80
Mike
Sure.

01:03:13.18
Mike
All right.

01:03:17.54
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:03:18.28
Bill
It's okay. you Do that, you know, as, as an aside and, you know, part of, or whatever your program is, you know?

01:03:19.51
Mike
Right.

01:03:22.94
Mike
Absolutely. Right. Well, I mean, you know, clearly we've ah we've been convinced that, you know, our way isn't working and outside help is ah what we need, whatever that happens to be.

01:03:34.98
Mike
You know, I mean, we walked into AA, man, you know, three quarters of this shit, nine tenths of this shit we didn't want to do.

01:03:35.54
Bill
Right.

01:03:43.28
Mike
It didn't make sense to us. There's no fucking way I'm going to go do that. And, you know, but we did it and our lives got better. So, again, by example, like walking through the fear, you know, we've learned by example that, you know, we need to be open to these things and realize that we don't have all the answers.

01:03:51.81
Bill
That's my example. What's the difference?

01:04:02.57
Mike
And sometimes we need some outside help. Sometimes, most of the time, we need some outside help.

01:04:09.27
Bill
Right. Yeah. Yeah. And so I mean, you know, and and again, you know, who even go back to something as simple as what we're doing right now.

01:04:10.25
Mike
Yeah.

01:04:15.35
Bill
I mean, who who know who knew that we and I'll just say that we needed something like this.

01:04:15.79
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:04:19.83
Bill
I think this has been an important part of of, you know, of our our recovery. And, you know, we did it for we did it for ourselves to begin with.

01:04:28.17
Mike
Right.

01:04:28.16
Bill
We we found an opportunity in a way, you know, to get together every week and and shoot the shit. And again, whatever whatever this is now and whatever it may be in the future, it kind of blows by it blows my mind.

01:04:39.48
Bill
We're we're coming up in four years, though. Did you, you know, maybe...

01:04:41.37
Mike
Right. Yeah, I know.

01:04:43.95
Bill
It's just that I just literally I thought about that the other day when because when we were talking to but that Jeremy on, I mentioned, you know, three and a half coming up on four years. That was the first time that ever came out of my mouth and in the back of my head while I'm talking.

01:04:53.62
Mike
Right. Right?

01:04:57.18
Bill
I'm like, holy fuck.

01:04:58.30
Mike
Yeah.

01:04:59.26
Bill
I mean, that's that's, you know one quarter of our sobriety now we've been doing this thing.

01:04:59.37
Mike
Mm-hmm. Yes. Mm-hmm.

01:05:04.69
Bill
That's.

01:05:07.02
Bill
It's fucking mind blowing. But anyhow, so, you know, so who knew that that this could be, you know, a benefit for us?

01:05:08.73
Mike
yes

01:05:13.28
Bill
Who know who knows a therapy could whatever the case is.

01:05:15.74
Mike
yeah

01:05:16.48
Bill
Like you said, I like the fact that you just said that, you know, we've become comfortable that, you know, knowing that, you know, yeah, if we that we if we need help, it's there. And, you know, the, you know, going to outside people or outside whatever.

01:05:27.67
Mike
Right. And even if it, yeah, exactly.

01:05:28.34
Bill
We've been convinced, I think you said. Yeah.

01:05:31.05
Mike
And again, you know, even if it doesn't make sense to us, even if, you know, we don't, we don't think, oh, well, I don't need, you know, right. Again, early sobriety, look back, asshole.

01:05:41.37
Mike
Early. So I don't need to, I don't need to do a fucking fourth step.

01:05:41.98
Bill
Right. Right.

01:05:46.17
Mike
What do you mean?

01:05:47.93
Bill
right

01:05:48.35
Mike
Look at myself. The hell's wrong with you.

01:05:53.70
Bill
God, I, uh, again, yeah.

01:05:54.26
Mike
Yeah. Mm-hmm.

01:05:57.27
Bill
Yeah. I just don't, uh, I don't know. I don't know. But, um, yeah, I don't know. Maybe the only thing I can, the only other thing I could say about this is even this fucking understatement. i mean, it's a, it's a tragedy and it just seems like, um, I don't know if there's going to be, I would highly, i would be surprised if there wasn't a lot of blame, you know, thrown around, um, you know, people trying to, people just trying to point fingers and and whatever.

01:06:18.14
Mike
isn

01:06:22.39
Bill
And, I guess, um I mean, i not to blame part of it, but if nothing else, if if if everyone that was involved in this can take a look at at their part, which is probably not, nobody's going to do, and maybe tighten it up so it doesn't happen again, I think that's the best that can come of that.

01:06:33.20
Mike
Mm hmm.

01:06:37.11
Mike
Right. Yep.

01:06:38.71
Bill
you know But it's the same thing with this whole, i it just popped into my head, no idea how this came out. Well, probably the accountability thing. um There was the one of the I think it was one of the doctors was just recently in the Matthew Perry thing was just recently convicted or sentenced or whatever it was.

01:06:56.86
Mike
Mm hmm. right.

01:06:58.81
Bill
And, um you know, it just I still i have I have opinions on that whole thing. I I 100 percent agree that. OK, so as a doctor, take take Matthew Perry out of the fucking mix or even take Rob Reiner out of the mix, you know, or Nick Reiner, whoever it is.

01:07:10.80
Mike
Uh-huh.

01:07:13.08
Mike
Right? Mm-hmm.

01:07:14.67
Bill
You know, doctors have a responsibility for, you know, obviously there are certain oaths they take and, you know, rules and in laws and restrictions and all those things they got to abide by.

01:07:22.08
Mike
Mm-hmm. All

01:07:24.88
Bill
It's the safety of the of the patient, you know, number one, and making sure that they they're doing their best, I believe, you know, probably to help to get them better within their power.

01:07:27.72
Mike
right.

01:07:33.28
Bill
You know, but when it comes to like these doctors and Matthew Perry, you Now, if they're prescribing, you know, over prescribing or prescribing outside of the rules, I get all that. You know, if that's why these doctors were arrested, sentenced and all the sort of things.

01:07:46.10
Mike
Sure.

01:07:46.58
Bill
But I didn't like the fact in that one documentary, one of the documentaries, I think Netflix did the did the one on it, where they were all they were doing was looking for somebody to fucking blame. All these, you know, for for Matthew Perry's death.

01:07:55.54
Mike
Right.

01:07:57.90
Bill
The bottom line was with him, it didn't matter. If these if these four or five people um weren't going to do anything for me, would have got it someplace else.

01:08:06.36
Mike
Yeah, right.

01:08:06.41
Bill
um um I mean, I think we talked about that. Both of us are convinced that Matthew Perry would have fucking died one way or the other.

01:08:08.60
Mike
Of course. Right. so Yeah. Yeah, right. Yeah. Well, yeah, clearly there's no, there were no rules and no laws and no, that stopped us from doing anything.

01:08:20.52
Mike
So, right.

01:08:20.98
Bill
Right.

01:08:21.60
Mike
Yeah, of course. You know, yeah, it's yeah again, like society tries to blame drug dealers for the drug problem. Well, that's insane. You know, right.

01:08:32.47
Mike
um let's Let's blame car manufacturers for air pollution. No, you know, it's just, you know, it's all nonsense.

01:08:37.82
Bill
Right.

01:08:42.04
Mike
So trying to place blame where it doesn't belong, trying to make somebody else responsible for your actions is really the bottom line. And um if we've learned anything, that doesn't fucking work.

01:08:55.33
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:08:55.96
Bill
Right. And we've said that openly, you know, that and we've we've we've you know said that in conversations that um whatever the case is, you know, not um I know i don't want to be a victim. I don't want to portray myself as a victim.

01:09:04.98
Mike
Right.

01:09:06.16
Bill
I know you don't either. You know what?

01:09:07.51
Mike
Right.

01:09:08.08
Bill
All that did the shit that happened. I mean, yes, there was other people involved in both of our lives, you know, to to get to the point that we got to of whatever it is.

01:09:12.50
Mike
yes

01:09:16.72
Bill
But um there's no fucking way in the world I'm going to try to, but oh, well, this person did this and this person did that.

01:09:22.36
Mike
h Right.

01:09:23.48
Bill
You know, whole fucking enabling and that whatever.

01:09:23.53
Mike
No. Yeah.

01:09:25.84
Bill
it it no, no.

01:09:27.24
Mike
No, I did it.

01:09:27.30
Bill
no

01:09:28.23
Mike
I did it.

01:09:28.52
Bill
Yeah.

01:09:28.91
Mike
and that's where and And that's where the freedom comes from. It's all my fucking fault.

01:09:32.54
Bill
Right.

01:09:34.33
Mike
No one else has dominion over me.

01:09:34.58
Bill
Yeah.

01:09:38.04
Mike
Just me.

01:09:38.06
Bill
Right.

01:09:38.72
Mike
Everything good, bad, indifferent is my fucking fault.

01:09:39.10
Bill
Yeah.

01:09:42.93
Bill
Yep. I was just, I was just going to say, you know, not just the bad stuff.

01:09:43.10
Mike
Yep.

01:09:45.47
Bill
Cause you made a, made a very clear point that all, all the good stuff is your fault.

01:09:45.74
Mike
Yeah.

01:09:48.89
Bill
All the bad stuff is your fault.

01:09:50.20
Mike
Yep.

01:09:50.65
Bill
All the, all the stuff in the middle is your fucking fault.

01:09:53.34
Mike
Yeah.

01:09:53.57
Bill
You know, it's, and there is, there's a, there's a goddamn freedom that.

01:09:54.13
Mike
Yeah.

01:09:56.76
Bill
So take some, take some goddamn responsibility for yourselves and you know, you, you might feel better every once in a while.

01:09:56.82
Mike
Absolutely. Mm-hmm.

01:10:02.15
Bill
Yeah.

01:10:02.23
Mike
Yes.

01:10:03.51
Bill
All right. So again, Rob Reiner, I mean, I don't even even know what else to say. I mean, all that shit's going to shake out whatever happens with with Nick.

01:10:06.90
Mike
Yeah. Right.

01:10:09.67
Bill
It's a fucking tragedy. It is what it is.

01:10:11.25
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:10:11.39
Bill
But um I don't know. The fact that he was he was one of us and, you know, um I just thought would be, if nothing else, um you know, it's not that just because everyone else was talking about it. I mean, I just, I had some i had some thoughts and opinions and, you know, all right.

01:10:20.86
Mike
Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah, me too.

01:10:24.89
Bill
So there.

01:10:25.18
Mike
Yeah, rest in peace, Marty DeBergey.

01:10:25.37
Bill
Okay.

01:10:28.70
Bill
Yes. All right. um A couple of the things that I came across it. you ever watched the show Brockmire or heard of it?

01:10:36.95
Mike
Oh, yeah.

01:10:37.91
Bill
Oh, Hank Asario.

01:10:38.97
Mike
yeah, yeah. I watched the first, I think, two and a half seasons. It started getting weird, and I kind of stepped away from it. But, you God, that first season was fucking incredible.

01:10:48.70
Bill
Right. Okay. So, well, good. um You know what? It's so it's so fucking rare that ah this this might wrap us up because I got a lot i got a lot of things to talk about with Brockmire. And I know it's it's ah it's a baseball it's a baseball show because I was going to tell you, i'm like I'm like, at some point you're going need to get fucking Netflix because all these good shows are on Netflix because that was an AMC one and then got pulled over on.

01:10:57.97
Mike
Yes.

01:11:00.79
Mike
Yes.

01:11:08.85
Mike
Yeah. I mean, I watched it i watched it when it was but it was... I think it was IFC...

01:11:14.52
Bill
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:11:15.16
Mike
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:11:15.52
Bill
I'm sorry.

01:11:15.76
Mike
The same that did Marin.

01:11:15.88
Bill
It was IFC.

01:11:17.04
Mike
Yeah. Independent film channel.

01:11:17.56
Bill
Yep. Yeah.

01:11:18.68
Mike
Yeah. And, ah and um yeah, cause it definitely wasn't like network cause yeah, no, no.

01:11:23.61
Bill
Right.

01:11:26.80
Mike
And I, I forget, but I watched it pretty much when it was going on. I think I had a show box or there was like an app at one point, which they took away from us, but it was free and it was great.

01:11:38.81
Mike
It was movies and TV shows. And um yeah, this is like probably seven, eight years ago. Uh, maybe even nine when it was on. I mean, it's an old show.

01:11:49.08
Mike
It was on a long time ago.

01:11:51.86
Bill
Yeah. And, uh, uh, keep talking. I'm, I'm, I'm losing your, I'm losing your audio.

01:11:56.76
Mike
Really?

01:11:58.14
Bill
Yeah. Are you, uh, you good on your connection?

01:11:59.03
Mike
ah it's, uh, it's, yeah, it's all good. And it, the little lines are coming through on my, on my thing. So it's all good on my end.

01:12:07.61
Bill
Yeah. You're like, uh, you're kind of, uh, like, can you hear me clearly or no?

01:12:11.58
Mike
Yeah, totally. Totally.

01:12:13.21
Bill
Okay. Yeah. You're coming like bubbled out kind of like, uh, like the underwater type of bubbled out.

01:12:17.53
Mike
there that's your end.

01:12:19.43
Bill
Um, hang on one sec. What?

01:12:21.98
Mike
That's, that's on your end. Cause, uh, yeah, my little, my little soundbar lines are just fine. And I hear you just fine.

01:12:29.75
Bill
No, no, no. I know. I mean, i can I can see your lines too. I don't know which side which side it's coming from. I'm not trying to cast blame on it. I'm just trying to figure out where it's where it's coming from.

01:12:34.93
Mike
Yeah. yeah

01:12:37.33
Bill
Give me one more second here.

01:12:39.07
Mike
All right. Blah, blah, blah. Brock, Brock, Brock. Yeah.

01:12:45.94
Bill
Yeah, I can't hear a word you're saying.

01:12:47.51
Mike
Wow.

01:12:47.51
Bill
um Hang on one more second here. I'm just trying to figure out if there's...

01:12:52.69
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:12:54.04
Bill
You still there?

01:12:54.94
Mike
I'm still right here.

01:12:56.63
Bill
Yeah, see, I'm still getting i'm still getting it. um I can't think. I'm trying to think of what I could

01:13:03.05
Mike
Well, I think I lost you now.

01:13:03.92
Bill
Hang on one

01:13:06.23
Mike
I know I did, because your little sound line is totally dead.

01:13:07.86
Bill
know one second.

01:13:11.20
Mike
am... i Going to grab my phone.

01:13:15.27
Bill
You're still there though, right?

01:13:17.21
Mike
and

01:13:19.15
Bill
Yep, no, I think you're gone.

01:13:21.91
Mike
a And we'll call Bill.

01:13:22.14
Bill
Okay, I am going to

01:13:24.88
Mike
Well, there are back.

01:13:26.30
Bill
Oh, and you're back too. Okay, we're good.

01:13:27.64
Mike
Hey, you were gone.

01:13:30.62
Bill
Yeah, you were too. Yeah, it was just, it was total, total silence. So there was a, like I said, I wasn't trying to, I wasn't trying to blame. I mean, I could see, I could see the same thing.

01:13:37.20
Mike
Right.

01:13:38.62
Bill
I'm i'm seeing the audio lines on both, but the the thing of that is,

01:13:38.87
Mike
Right.

01:13:41.85
Mike
Did yours keep going? Because it went dead on my end.

01:13:45.27
Bill
Oh, yeah.

01:13:45.46
Mike
You went totally flat.

01:13:45.49
Bill
I mean, again, well, and that's the thing that it's going, even if, um if the recording's not on and either one of us are talking, well, at least on my end, even if ah we're not recording, i my lines will come up, you know, so it'll get on there anyhow.

01:13:59.66
Mike
Hmm.

01:14:01.59
Bill
So, but it it doesn't, I guess it doesn't really matter what it just, the the thing of it is though, is that what I'm guessing is, is that your full conversation is going to be on the recording because of how this does.

01:14:01.96
Mike
All

01:14:05.58
Mike
right.

01:14:11.38
Mike
Oh, yeah.

01:14:12.51
Bill
I just couldn't hear you.

01:14:12.88
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:14:13.67
Bill
So um let's, let's just step back.

01:14:14.01
Mike
Okay.

01:14:15.59
Bill
So the Brockmire thing, you started watching, we got to the point.

01:14:17.47
Mike
Black bar.

01:14:21.72
Bill
So we got to the point IFC and you were, we, I said, it's a baseball show.

01:14:24.09
Mike
Yes.

01:14:25.20
Bill
And then you, that's where I, that's where I lost you.

01:14:25.54
Mike
Yep.

01:14:27.28
Bill
So kind of recap that couple of minutes of whatever that was.

01:14:27.54
Mike
um Okay. ah No, I just, I watched it when it was on. It's, I mean, it was on like eight, nine years ago.

01:14:33.91
Bill
Right.

01:14:33.94
Mike
um Yeah. You know, but I, yeah, I had some app that was free and let, let me watch stuff. Of course that went away. Cause you know, they but um yeah. So I, again, I watched the first couple of seasons and like I said, I think into the third season, it started getting really weird and I was like, all right, well I'm done with this. But yeah, the first season was fantastic.

01:14:55.70
Bill
Yeah. And, you know, I, I watched it and it came, it came on Netflix. And i mean, I've always liked Hank Azaria to begin with, and you know, he's sober also, um you know, which that those was the only, august guess but I'll get back to that.

01:15:01.84
Mike
Sure. Mm-hmm. Yeah, right.

01:15:08.12
Bill
But so let's say if it was, and I can't remember, it might've been four seasons. So like you said, like by the third season started getting weird.

01:15:12.26
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:15:14.68
Bill
I agree with you.

01:15:15.06
Mike
Yeah, right.

01:15:15.60
Bill
The fourth season was, it like jumped ahead by like 20 years.

01:15:16.08
Mike
Uh-huh.

01:15:18.84
Bill
He's got a daughter, you know, from this, you know, the hookup some years ago and blah, blah, blah. And then it got really fucking weird. I watched like two, three episodes into that, um two episodes, maybe like I can't stand this anymore.

01:15:24.92
Mike
Yeah.

01:15:29.40
Mike
Right.

01:15:29.71
Bill
um But yeah, the the first episode, will then on on top of it, Amanda Peet, I love her.

01:15:35.14
Mike
Uh-huh. Yeah. She's kind of cute.

01:15:37.91
Bill
ah she's She's fucking lovely, yes.

01:15:40.25
Mike
Yes.

01:15:40.67
Bill
um But yeah, the ah the whole thing, the only thing and what made me think about it, I had it written down, but I i forgot I wrote it down. But when you said how TV and movies do when you're talking about that movie,

01:15:52.39
Bill
talk about us and the program and stuff like that. it it it just It blew my mind sometimes how I think they could have done a better job about not... They were making Alcoholics Anonymous and the the they were making it really cliche.

01:16:06.60
Bill
All the cliches, even more cliche than they...

01:16:07.23
Mike
Mm-hmm. Right.

01:16:09.90
Bill
They're actually...

01:16:10.14
Mike
they Right.

01:16:10.41
Bill
And part of it, I'm just like, like God damn it, he's he's an AA guy. Couldn't you he have stood up and be like, no, can we at least say it this way?

01:16:14.33
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:16:17.06
Bill
You know, sort of thing.

01:16:17.43
Mike
Right.

01:16:17.99
Bill
Yeah. um but i don't know did you catch on to the same thing because that went through the the entire the entire show

01:16:23.53
Mike
Mm-hmm. yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean, that I certainly didn't like, you know, i was watching it for him being out of control. Yeah.

01:16:30.17
Bill
yeah no right

01:16:31.30
Mike
You know, that's when it was good. ah Right. I mean, you know, yeah, again, very few but Hollywood version of of recovery generally doesn't get it right.

01:16:43.66
Mike
You know, I thought I thought Marin show did pretty good.

01:16:46.81
Bill
Yeah, in it that's been a long time since I've watched that, but I agree.

01:16:47.38
Mike
Yeah.

01:16:51.10
Mike
Yeah.

01:16:51.67
Bill
i agree. I remember thinking the same thing, but it it has been ah it has been a while since I watched that.

01:16:54.96
Mike
hmm.

01:16:57.35
Bill
But yeah, there was...

01:16:57.53
Mike
Right.

01:16:58.87
Bill
And then the ah the other one that got it good was the the dude that from Office Space, that that show, because he...

01:17:07.10
Mike
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Which I've never seen. i know what you're talking about, though. um um um Shit. the hell is It starts with the B, right?

01:17:14.90
Bill
Yeah. Something like that, but it's, yeah, his name, you know, but that's a name that showed that show.

01:17:17.18
Mike
Yeah, right.

01:17:18.74
Bill
They did pretty well, I think.

01:17:19.98
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:17:20.26
Bill
But yeah, if if you ever get around it, I know that's one that would kind of be on your list to watch. That was a good one.

01:17:24.44
Mike
Yeah.

01:17:25.30
Bill
But I mean, I agree though that, yeah, I mean Brockmire, that first season, even into the second one. Yeah. Like you said, just having him out of control.

01:17:33.03
Mike
Yep.

01:17:33.31
Bill
But on top of that too, I'm like, I knew with, I knew you'd enjoy that, but I also knew just being the baseball sort of thing.

01:17:38.65
Mike
Right.

01:17:38.99
Bill
I'm like, like, this is one that if, if you haven't watched this, I'm like, you've got to watch this fucking show.

01:17:39.40
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:17:43.00
Mike
Nope.

01:17:43.15
Bill
So I'm,

01:17:43.40
Mike
I definitely did that one.

01:17:45.14
Bill
Yeah, i'm I'm happy. I'm happy to hear that because literally just as so many times that these things come up, I'm like, like, fuck man, you would have, you'd really enjoy that show.

01:17:50.58
Mike
Right.

01:17:52.90
Bill
But yeah, he was just, he was a trip.

01:17:53.81
Mike
Yep.

01:17:54.94
Bill
He was a fucking trip. I mean, the whole thing was a trip.

01:17:58.49
Mike
Yeah. No. Once again, I'm watching reruns of Emergency. So, you know. Yeah.

01:18:05.02
Bill
Yeah, but I did. i yeah Obviously, again, Amanda Peave, he was good. and it just it's so It's so funny, too, that um every once in a while when he when he was talking, I hear Chief Wiggum.

01:18:16.09
Mike
Yeah.

01:18:17.09
Bill
Because i mean that's one of his you know Simpsons characters and all these different ones that he did.

01:18:18.69
Mike
Sure.

01:18:21.45
Bill
And it just, yeah I don't know, it's it was almost like I'd look away for a second he'd say something. I'm like, oh my God. Yeah. It's fucking Chief Wiggum, you know, because so many of these, some of these people, well, I mean, what am I thinking of?

01:18:29.97
Mike
Right.

01:18:35.74
Bill
um Seth, who's the family guy, dude?

01:18:38.25
Mike
McFarlane.

01:18:38.89
Bill
Yeah, there you go. Yeah, and let's just listening to him every once in a while, you know, just his normal voice, you know, you can, you can hear, know,

01:18:41.99
Mike
Mm-hmm. Right. You'll hear Peter.

01:18:45.94
Bill
Oh, God, yeah.

01:18:46.55
Mike
Yeah, right.

01:18:46.70
Bill
yeah just

01:18:47.41
Mike
Mm-hmm. Yep.

01:18:49.56
Bill
Yeah, which – well, that's good. I mean, it makes me happy. I'm glad that you watched Brockmire.

01:18:54.93
Mike
this

01:18:55.22
Bill
Yeah, it was ah it was a good one, like you said, at least at least the first ah first couple of seasons. But hang on one second here. there was There was one other one. Oh, you know what? This is one that – And I for first of all, I know we've talked about this before, but I just thought it was again came across my mind.

01:19:12.95
Bill
So the idea or the topic of comparing ourselves to others, specifically like when we first got sober and and clearly I know we've talked about it, but i I don't know if it came across more likely when I was listening to a podcast or something like that.

01:19:17.88
Mike
Mm. Mm-hmm.

01:19:27.08
Bill
But I thought that, you know, even though we've talked about it's probably been a while, but also if there's anyone new listening to us. So I don't know your, your opinion about the whole, what's the whole concept about, about that, you know, comparing ourselves either to people, how do we deal with that?

01:19:43.10
Bill
What's the whole comparing ourselves type of thing?

01:19:45.46
Mike
Well, ah I mean, there's two sides of it, as always. ah Right. You know, I mean, there there's a ah phrase in AA comparing yourself out of the room.

01:19:57.02
Mike
You know, I wasn't that bad or, you know, ah or I was far worse than, um you know, can...

01:19:57.37
Bill
Right. Right.

01:20:03.74
Mike
can scoot your ass right out of the room. You know, I didn't, I didn't get that bad. I wasn't that bad. I'm not that bad or I'm far worse than that. And so there's no way that, you know, this is going to work for me because, uh, you know, I I'm, I'm way too far gone.

01:20:18.27
Mike
Um, that's, that's the bad comparing yourself to others. Um, you know, uh, right.

01:20:21.97
Bill
right

01:20:24.43
Mike
Which is a very dangerous and stupid thing to do. Uh, yeah.

01:20:27.96
Bill
ah

01:20:30.74
Mike
how do I really?

01:20:31.06
Bill
How do you really feel?

01:20:31.78
Mike
Yeah, thank you.

01:20:34.46
Bill
yeah

01:20:34.58
Mike
Right. But the but the other side of it is comparing yourself to others. Am I, am I, you know, finding the people, you know, you want what they have, do what they do. You know, um, am I living up to what these other people are doing?

01:20:44.36
Bill
Right.

01:20:47.58
Mike
am I living up to the way this thing is supposed to work? Am I doing what I'm supposed to do? Comparing yourself that way, i think is healthy. Um, you know, and, and I try to do it.

01:20:56.42
Bill
Right.

01:20:58.97
Mike
Um, you know, yeah, you know, look at that guy.

01:21:01.48
Bill
Right.

01:21:02.71
Mike
He's, he's happy. He's healthy. The people around him are happy and healthy. Shit. I should probably, ah you know, am I living up to it? Compare yourself to that. Please do. um Yeah.

01:21:14.20
Mike
So, you know, there's two ways to look at it. There's the bad and the good as with everything. And um yeah, you know, um learn it. Learn how to, you know, don't let yourself, don't compare yourself out of the room, but, you know, compare yourself to stay in the room.

01:21:30.93
Mike
How about that? this

01:21:33.40
Bill
do you Do you think, I mean, this time around, I mean, once again, you you've been open that you've you've been around this thing a couple of times before.

01:21:36.46
Mike
Hmm. Mm-hmm. Right.

01:21:40.16
Bill
Do you think that this time you compared yourself at all to others? Because, you know, um I'm just, I shouldn't assume, but I'm thinking that maybe you did it at one point or, right.

01:21:49.21
Mike
Oh, sure. Before? Yeah.

01:21:50.65
Bill
Right.

01:21:50.93
Mike
Yeah, absolutely. You know, ah yeah. And generally in the way that, you know, naturally we do. I'm not that bad.

01:22:00.44
Bill
Right.

01:22:02.97
Mike
you know, and, and, and actually in the other way too, you know, Oh, I'm fucking way worse than that. You know? Yeah. Shit. Of course he's doing this sobriety thing. You know, he was never as bad as I am. So of course it's easy for him.

01:22:15.48
Bill
Right.

01:22:15.51
Mike
You know? Yeah. Um, yeah, I know I did. Uh, And again, this time, no, I didn't. Look for the you know look for the similarities, and not the differences. and um and And again, yes, compare yourself to the people that are doing well and doing this thing properly. and um yeah, absolutely compare yourself to them.

01:22:36.63
Bill
Right. And you know, the the thing that is, is that I know for a fact, but I heard it pretty early. i don't remember when, but I remember it was, i know it i was pretty early in the in this whole thing once once I got to the Keating Center about not comparing yourself.

01:22:50.03
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:22:52.19
Bill
Yeah.

01:22:52.48
Mike
Right.

01:22:52.92
Bill
you know But I know to begin with I did. I mean, because when you think of it, just on just on the surface, I mean, I had i had the audacity to just look you know physically and be like, oh I'm not one of these people.

01:22:55.98
Mike
Sure.

01:23:00.30
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:23:03.76
Bill
you know um That was number one, which I mean, just because you know ah put a pig in a suit, that was my dad's favorite saying.

01:23:04.02
Mike
Sure.

01:23:09.48
Bill
you know what do you What do you get when you put a pig in a suit? to Just get a you know nicely dressed pig. That's all you get.

01:23:13.83
Mike
Yep. Mm-hmm.

01:23:14.88
Bill
But then, you know and on top of that, I'm like, well, all these all these people you know use drugs and drugs.

01:23:20.81
Mike
Mm hmm.

01:23:21.00
Bill
You know, i didn't I didn't do any of that.

01:23:23.33
Mike
Of course.

01:23:23.48
Bill
But you know what? it And I can't remember anyone specifically saying it, but I know what happened. People said it the other way around. Like, you don't understand. You know, you've got it easy because all you were was a boozer, you know.

01:23:34.81
Mike
Mm hmm.

01:23:35.39
Bill
um And I'm like, I'm like...

01:23:36.37
Mike
Right. Mm hmm.

01:23:38.14
Bill
the The whole idea was, okay, so I was just killing myself slower. That's all it was.

01:23:43.03
Mike
o

01:23:43.26
Bill
um you know was it Again, i mean we know these things now, and I truly believe that if i if I would have found drugs and the right amount of drugs and the right drugs, that i I would have been dead because if I had the same mentality, which I don't know why I wouldn't have,

01:23:50.73
Mike
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Sure.

01:23:56.19
Mike
Yeah. Well, you do.

01:23:57.59
Bill
And a yeah, with it it, I would, if I would have used the same way that I drank, then I mean, just do the math.

01:23:58.27
Mike
Uh-huh.

01:24:04.22
Bill
I would have, I would have died years ago, I think.

01:24:04.66
Mike
Yeah. Mm-hmm. Right.

01:24:06.98
Bill
um But, you know, the, the other thing that, that I, I remember hearing, and maybe this is what heard to begin with was, you know, stick around long enough and you will hear your story, you know?

01:24:19.13
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:24:20.09
Bill
And I don't remember when it happened, but of course I did, you know, and I, you know, the, the first time and then the second time, and then many times you hear, you know, these bits and pieces.

01:24:23.03
Mike
Right, of course.

01:24:27.35
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:24:28.65
Bill
And that's, that's why I like, um, I think that's a big part of why I like listening to sobriety podcasts. And you know what?

01:24:36.19
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:24:36.89
Bill
I am sometimes more interested in listening to, um, women's stories than men. I know what us fucking guys do, you know, I've lived it, you know?

01:24:42.93
Mike
Mm-hmm. Right. Right.

01:24:46.49
Bill
For the most part, you know, this guy might have done a little bit more over here like you. You did all the drugs, you know, four times as many as is whatever.

01:24:50.65
Mike
Yeah. Mm-hmm.

01:24:53.85
Bill
you You did everything, you know, and you had a rock and roll lifestyle.

01:24:55.38
Mike
Right.

01:24:57.39
Bill
I know where your path was. So far different than what I did.

01:24:58.90
Mike
Uh-huh.

01:25:00.35
Bill
But I mean, in a general sense, you and I, you know, you and I were the same, just kind of, you know, in different colors, you know.

01:25:04.66
Mike
Mm-hmm. Yeah, exactly. Uh-huh.

01:25:07.74
Bill
but ah listening to some of these fucking chicks, I mean, the, the, the women that we know, the women that we're friends with here and their stories.

01:25:11.38
Mike
Right. aha right

01:25:14.94
Bill
And it just, I'm the same. either It's one of two things. Either. I'm like, I'm like Jesus Christ, or I'm like, God damn. They're just like us, you know?

01:25:22.12
Mike
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

01:25:22.84
Bill
And it just, it's a it's a natural grounder just realizing, I don't know why, maybe that's, maybe that's what it is.

01:25:23.42
Mike
Right.

01:25:29.59
Bill
It's just a natural grounder realizing that, you know, it's just the, ah the confirmation that everyone's the same. It doesn't matter, you know, gender background, it doesn't fucking matter, you know?

01:25:35.99
Mike
a

01:25:38.78
Mike
right

01:25:39.34
Bill
But the the biggest thing is that, yeah, sooner or later, And if anyone out it listens to us, and that was another question I had, but if I don't know if anyone listens to us that's like really fucking new or even people that are, you know, kind of like on the bubble that are maybe are just looking at getting sober and stumbled across our podcast.

01:25:57.27
Mike
Mm-hmm. Right.

01:25:59.35
Bill
If just out of, I mean, sheer curiosity, if somebody is listening to us and you have not yet committed to sobriety yet, I mean, more power to you for listening to this fucking garbage. If you're not, I mean, if you're not even trying to get sober yet or even thinking about it, if you're sober curious and you're trying to listen to us, Jesus, I mean, I don't know.

01:26:09.05
Mike
ah Right.

01:26:17.21
Mike
he

01:26:18.84
Bill
Sorry. Sorry.

01:26:20.09
Mike
yeah or you're welcome

01:26:20.70
Bill
or Or maybe you're you're welcome.

01:26:22.07
Mike
yeah

01:26:23.20
Bill
um but But seriously, I would be interested. i know that normies listen to us, but they're usually friends of ours, you know.

01:26:29.02
Mike
easy Right.

01:26:30.18
Bill
But I would be interested to know if somebody that is is either on that bubble or about to get sober, wants to get sober, just curious, you know. to If you want to reach out to us, let us know. just morbid curiosity.

01:26:40.55
Bill
um You know, but the thing with it is, if if anyone is out there and and if you're new-ish and you haven't heard your story yet, honest to God, you know, just...

01:26:41.01
Mike
Yeah.

01:26:49.70
Bill
Listen to more podcasts. If you don't go to meetings, that's fine.

01:26:51.22
Mike
Yeah.

01:26:52.58
Bill
um Have more conversations. You will hear your story. And it's a fucking life changer, you know, because it's it's one thing walking into a room, you know, or or if you do online Zoom meetings and you see, you know, 54 other people and they're like, Jesus Christ, we're all these goddamn drug addict addicts and alcoholics come from.

01:26:55.64
Mike
hu Yeah.

01:27:04.22
Mike
m

01:27:10.09
Mike
Yeah.

01:27:10.42
Bill
You know, it wass like the first time we walked into you know Keating Men's and I'm like, Jesus Christ, there's a hundred people here.

01:27:10.61
Mike
Yeah.

01:27:13.94
Mike
Yeah. Uh-huh.

01:27:14.70
Bill
And then we walk into West Park and there's 300 people.

01:27:17.03
Mike
You will.

01:27:17.72
Bill
And that means I'm like, I can't, I i didn't even know there were this many alcoholics in the world.

01:27:22.49
Mike
ah

01:27:23.83
Bill
You know, I did, but you know,

01:27:25.40
Mike
aha

01:27:26.10
Bill
So, um yeah, stick around. You'll hear that you'll hear your story. But but yeah, that's that's interesting.

01:27:29.14
Mike
you will

01:27:31.88
Bill
know I like the fact of, um you know again, looking for, I mean, I know about the looking for the similarities, but I like the way you put that as far as, yes, when you see somebody doing the things that you think you might want, well, you do you do want, you just don't know it yet.

01:27:38.55
Mike
Uh-huh.

01:27:44.35
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:27:45.88
Bill
um

01:27:45.91
Mike
Yeah.

01:27:46.74
Bill
And then, yeah, absolutely compare yourself.

01:27:49.05
Mike
Yep.

01:27:49.06
Bill
Even even today, I mean, you know we can look at people. We can look at our sponsors.

01:27:52.53
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:27:53.42
Bill
We can look at that, you know, the the the old timers that, you know, or who do you know or or any of the meetings that we go to.

01:27:56.73
Mike
Yeah.

01:27:59.42
Mike
Right.

01:27:59.50
Bill
um You know, and am am I like that? Do I carry myself that way?

01:28:03.11
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:28:03.62
Bill
I hope I do, you know.

01:28:04.10
Mike
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

01:28:05.18
Bill
um

01:28:05.40
Mike
Yeah, exactly.

01:28:06.42
Bill
But I don't know. I mean, it's just, ah yeah, the comparing in a good way rather than than a bad way.

01:28:10.86
Mike
Yeah.

01:28:11.46
Bill
I like that.

01:28:12.04
Mike
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

01:28:14.20
Bill
So anyhow, um but yeah, yeah that covered that covered kind of two things because um yeah I did that. I don't even, again, I don't know where I where i wrote ah or where I came up with that. Again, probably another podcast where they were talking about, um it was a podcast, I think, where they they knew that they had a lot of people that would listen. you know They've heard the stories you know where people like, oh, I listened to you when I was trying to get sober. Yeah.

01:28:36.69
Bill
blah, blah, blah. And I'm just like, God, would, would anyone listen to this shit? at you I don't know. I couldn't imagine, you know, for, for me sitting around with a, you know, fucking, I don't know, a beer or glass of goddamn whiskey listening to this fucking nonsense.

01:28:51.70
Mike
who

01:28:53.59
Bill
but I don't, I don't know. Who knows? Maybe we're, maybe we're, we're funny enough where, you know, exactly.

01:28:55.48
Mike
Right. Yeah. Funny how.

01:29:01.18
Bill
Exactly. Exactly. Well, on that note, Mike, what, what do you think?

01:29:03.93
Mike
Yes.

01:29:04.62
Bill
Do you, do you feel like we're done?

01:29:06.14
Mike
I believe we are done.

01:29:08.12
Bill
All right.

01:29:08.76
Mike
Right. Well, thank you everyone for listening to yet another episode of Sober Not Mature. Always be kind to each other, be good to each other, go out and do something nice for somebody else this week and don't tell anybody you did it.

01:29:24.06
Mike
Now, from the bottom of my heart to the depths of my soul, from the beginning of time until the ends of the earth, always and eternally, fuck you.

01:29:37.78
Mike
Now it's time, kids. Oh boy, it's time. It's time for you to fuck off. Then keep fucking off. Keep fucking off till you get to a gate with a sign on it saying, you cannot fuck off past here.

01:29:51.51
Mike
Climb over that gate. Dream the impossible dream. and Keep fucking off forever.

01:29:58.83
Bill
Once again, I like when you, who it's that time.

01:30:00.98
Mike
so first person

01:30:01.40
Bill
it is that time. And just like last thing real quick, and I just wrote this down because i wanted to tell you, I think I'm pretty sure, 90% sure I'm going to give up my Harley plates. um Wisconsin is coming.

01:30:10.58
Mike
Ah.

01:30:12.80
Bill
Do you remember, ah you've done plenty of traveling over the years. Do you remember when Wisconsin, I'm not getting these plates. The first first thing we're going talk about not getting these plates Do you remember when Wisconsin had that really just, they were like fucking gold plates.

01:30:25.56
Mike
Yeah.

01:30:25.66
Bill
They were gold with like black lettering or red lettering. They had two different kinds.

01:30:28.38
Mike
yeah

01:30:29.58
Bill
They were, they were just really fucking weird. So they're bringing back those.

01:30:31.96
Mike
Yeah.

01:30:33.10
Bill
um And they're, they're designing a, a blackout plate. So just black with white lettering.

01:30:40.24
Mike
Yep. You know what?

01:30:41.14
Bill
And yeah, I'm, I'm going to get them, I think, because,

01:30:41.47
Mike
Ohio's getting those too, I think. Yeah, I think I am too.

01:30:46.42
Bill
Well, and, you know, here's here's the thing. And I had the the reason I went with the with the Harley plates. First, I like the look of them. That's number one.

01:30:52.09
Mike
m

01:30:52.86
Bill
um The there is I mean, I pay one hundred and twenty five dollars a year for the plates because I'm paying for personalized. Plus, twenty five dollars goes to the the share of the road campaign, which I've known plenty of people over the years that ride.

01:30:58.94
Mike
Right.

01:31:02.78
Mike
Right.

01:31:05.04
Bill
And it's a good cause.

01:31:05.59
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:31:05.96
Bill
and i had no issue with that ever doing it.

01:31:06.63
Mike
Sure.

01:31:08.73
Bill
But the other thought was, I'm like, at some point, um you know, I'm like, I'm im probably going to get a bike. It'd be cool. you know, I wanted to get a bike.

01:31:14.31
Mike
Hmm.

01:31:15.53
Bill
i'm I'm kind of at that realization now where I'm probably never going to get a bike.

01:31:17.75
Mike
Hmm. Right.

01:31:19.83
Bill
yeah I just don't think it'd be a good idea because, I mean, my knees are so fucked anyhow.

01:31:24.28
Mike
Right.

01:31:24.27
Bill
um I just don't I don't think it'd be a good idea for me to be. I think if I, I think I'd be fine, but you know, until I wasn't, so i don't want to, want to do that.

01:31:29.94
Mike
yes Right.

01:31:32.17
Bill
But so same type of thing. They're going to be, it'd probably be the same price, maybe a little bit less, but they're going to do it for, um you know, it's roadway ah repairs and improvements and whatever.

01:31:41.63
Mike
Hmm.

01:31:42.43
Bill
So it has, again, has a point and a purpose, but I'm like, that'd be kind of, I, cause I know ah Illinois has them like, I think they're Cubs plates, which, you know,

01:31:44.93
Mike
Right.

01:31:51.49
Mike
Uh huh.

01:31:51.96
Bill
And they're black. And I saw um Wisconsin has another black plate. I just saw them today, you know, out of ah there some other symbol on them.

01:32:00.08
Mike
Hmm.

01:32:00.30
Bill
Wisconsin has like probably like 75 different first.

01:32:02.70
Mike
Aha. Yeah. Yeah.

01:32:03.62
Bill
It's, it's fucking ridiculous, but, but I mean, just a straight blackout plate there, they're available, I think after the first of the year.

01:32:05.52
Mike
aha

01:32:08.15
Mike
yeah yeah

01:32:10.74
Bill
So I'm going to take a look and see, and then I'll get, you know, there's no reason in the world why I shouldn't be able to get my, I mean, who's going to have my, the GL 38 thing and, you know, just give up the Harley and go to the blackout plate.

01:32:18.01
Mike
Right.

01:32:20.66
Bill
I think it'd be, I think they look cool too.

01:32:21.24
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:32:22.50
Bill
so

01:32:22.81
Mike
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I believe Ohio's getting them after the first of the year as well. um And yeah, i'm looking into them myself. So, hey, pretty cool.

01:32:32.22
Bill
Yeah, well, I mean, the Ohio plates, you've you said that you're not a real fan of.

01:32:36.31
Mike
Nah.

01:32:36.50
Bill
I know you know the sunburst ones i I was never a fan of.

01:32:39.10
Mike
Oh, those are awful.

01:32:39.58
Bill
and then And then even the ones that that you have in your car now, I got those.

01:32:44.11
Mike
Yeah.

01:32:44.46
Bill
That was the the second personalized plate I got because they came out with that for just some random thing.

01:32:47.53
Mike
Mm-hmm.

01:32:51.09
Bill
They're oh, let's get new plates again. you know So I got those because I didn't like the sunburst ones.

01:32:53.21
Mike
Yeah.

01:32:56.34
Bill
so But yeah yeah, I think blackout plates would be great. I might have to buy a black car. or Fuck. Jesus. No, I'm not going to.

01:33:03.42
Mike
Yeah. Yes. Love you too. We shall. Next year.

01:33:04.68
Bill
It'll look fine on my gray car. It'll be all good.

01:33:06.46
Mike
Yeah. help

01:33:08.18
Bill
All right, man. i yeah on On that note, I love you, brother.

01:33:10.52
Mike
yes love you too

01:33:12.76
Bill
And I believe we'll talk soon.

01:33:14.81
Mike
we shall next year

01:33:16.51
Bill
Bye. yeah Oh yeah. And, uh, and by the way, just as a, as a quick side note, we do. Oh no, no, we don't have a guest next week. It's, it's us again.

01:33:23.70
Mike
Yeah.

01:33:24.28
Bill
Jesus Christ.

01:33:24.58
Mike
Yeah.

01:33:25.25
Bill
Nevermind. It's us again. Yes.

01:33:26.58
Mike
Yep. Bye.

01:33:26.88
Bill
Next year for the, for the, wow. who Anyhow. Yes. Next. See, see you next year, man.

01:33:32.82
Mike
a

01:33:32.97
Bill
Bye.

01:33:35.40
Bill
bye

01:33:35.96
Mike
by